Hi,<BR>H has seen an attorney.He has offered what he thinks he should pay for child support.H sasy attorney to expensive ,we should use a paralegal.I tried plan a, I lived in emotional pain for months. Plan b briefly.No plan now,also no more intense emotional pain.Acceptance ,and grieving a loss.bethn

Hi beth,<P>Well, I went to a paralegal, and yes, less expensive, but I think it only works if you both agree on the terms. Otherwise, you NEED an attorney. <P>I'm sorry for your pain too...

Beth,<P>Yes...<BR>Sheryl is right...<P><B>You need an attorney</B>!<P>Here is my standard line...<BR>If you need to <B>protect</B> yourself legally (and/or financially)... I usually make the recommendation of finding a <B>good</B> attorney. A good place to start off is at the <A HREF="http://lawyers.martindale.com/marhub/form/by.html" TARGET=_blank>Martindale-Hubbell Lawyer Search</A> site. Do a search within your county... look for only "family law" specialists(>80% in divorce/custody/etc.)... make sure they do a lot of "family law committee work"... if they know the judges all the better... You can normally find a few that will give initial counseling free of charge.<BR><A HREF="http://www.uslaw.com" TARGET=_blank>USLaw.com</A> (an alternative search site).<P>Interestingly I got an "advertized" e-mail about some legal services...at <A HREF="http://www.ejfa.com/tapster" TARGET=_blank>http://www.ejfa.com/tapster</A> <P>If you want I'll forward the entire e-mail message to you...<P>------------------------------------<P>BTW... how come Plan B was so short?<P> <P>Jim

With kids, you need an attorney.<P>Try to prepare yourself for court. It will (at least was for me) worse than you can imagine.<P>I would check to see if his child support offer is within the standard guidelines. Most states use some kind of standard. Key in "child support calculator" into your search engine, and you will get some. Choose the one specific to your state.<P>Remember that the lawyer works for you, not the other way around.<P>One thing that helped me was to research as much as I could so that I was prepared. There are a number of helpful websites that I would be happy to post or send to you by email if you would like. Plenty of ideas for parenting plans, what to do in case of a custody evaluation, etc.<P>My best suggestion is to get everything in writing. Try to think of every possible scenario, and address it somewhere in the parenting plan. For your protection and the protection of your children. My plan will probably end up being 15 pages long. But we will know what is expected. No surprises.<P>Good Luck