Prayers to All<P>thought we were happily married 28 years. DDay Oct 5,99, 7 mo "Soul Mate" affair. Tried Plan A 8 wks (wasn't real good at Plan Aing). Asked him to leave,would not stop contact. H gone 8 wks and asked to try again. H home for 9 wks,tried Plan A again. Did better but still several major LB. Again he could not stop contact. H left could not give up OW. H gone for 5 wks, I'm in Plan B. Since Plan A not real successful, not sure I should be giving them so much time together, affraid will go from fantasy to real with so much time together? At times think I should go back to A, file Legal Sep or just go ahead and filr for Divorce. Mid-life crisis (turning 50 in Sept) Depressed, prob bi-polar, refuses to take medication. tells friends he's happy where he ids regardless of consequences. Thinking filing Legal Separation may help to wake him up? Or do I just stay in B. Help anyone?

Where I live, there really isn't any difference between a "legal" separation and one that is not recorded anywhere. As long as you are not living together or sleep together, you are considered "separated" by law. The time required by law to get divorced starts the day someone leaves the house. It doesn't matter if it is recorded somewhere or not.<P>The reason a legal separation protects you is because if you can get the financial settlement part taken care of before things get ugly, it will save a ton of arguing.<P>If you think it will shake things up, do it. What do you have to lose now? If it doesn't work, you are just ahead of the game. If it does work, well you got what you wanted.