All,<p>Well, this whole week has been pretty good aside from one brief moment of friction yesterday morning.<p>My wife is preparing to go to Atlanta over the weekend to visit her brother and their family, a trip she's planned for several months.<br>Tonight she was tired from work and told me she would not be feeling sexual. Of course I had hoped otherwise, but I said ok. Then we talked for a while and had a really good conversation about some things she didn't feel her family understood about her. It felt good to be communicating so casually and meaningfully.<br>She got on the computer and I went to the shower. Afterwards as I was preparing to shave she asked me what I was doing. I said I was getting ready to shave. She said, "I think I want you to pay me a visit."<br>I was thrilled that she had actually changed her mind. Of course I paid a visit and stayed a while. She even said she may go to Ohio with me over Thanksgiving when I go to see my folks. She had said before that, because of our problems, she would not go.<br>So, the tide may be turning. I won't yet rest all hope on it, but it certainly is a far cry from what it was a few weeks ago.

Bruce, I'm happy for you and hope that things continue along the same path. Your words have helped me and I hope that my situation will eventually improve. Good luck.

This is sooooo encouraging, Bruce! I've seen how frustrating it's been for you not knowing how your W will react to you from one moment to the next.<p>You know, so many of the relationship books I've been reading indicate that if you try to *act* a certain way, you'll begin to *feel* that way - act happy, be happy; act "in love" be "in love" ... If only we could get our uncertain spouses to believe that, so many of our frustrations would be eliminated.<p>I hope that someday I'll have something like this to report here too...<p>I think the hardest part of all for any of us who may get this far is to realize that the work still continues ... that we have to keep up the communication and keep doing whatever it is we are doing right...<p>terri

Bruce,<p>Thank you for sharing your success. I am truly happy for you and wish you the best. <p>Steph

All,<p>Thanks for your words. I just can't believe how well things are going. Today I took off on lunch break to drive my wife to the airport. She had to wait about 90 min. for her flight. I stayed with her the whole time. She wanted to know if I would get in trouble at work. I told her I had a pager and not to worry, I'd rather be with her until she left.<br>We just had fun talking. Before she boarded the plane she kissed me and said not to worry that she had a boyfriend where she was going. I didn't think she did, but it was still nice that she felt enough about me to address a possible concern a man might have in our recent situation.<br>She seems like she is pretty much her old self this past week. Though I haven't asked I don't believe she is looking for me to move out at this point. But I think I will ask just to let her know I'm not trying to presume on what seems to be a let up in pur problems.<br>Needless to say I'm feeling pretty darn good right now. However I intend to make it a point not to relax my diligence. I will not slip back into former behavior. I am excited about the possiblities ahead if we come together with a new appreciation of what it means to be husband and wife. I'm also feeling very humble about what appears to be a second chance. I cannot forget that just a few weeks ago I was just about sure I'd slide over the cliff's edge.<br>But, as the old saying goes, it ain't over till it's over. It is my sincere hope that everyone here will be making similar reports as the weeks go by. Thank you all for your support.

Bruce, does your wife know about the Marriage Builders organization and concepts? I mean, really know. If not, at some point you may want to introduce her to them. Obviously, not until you are certain she would be comfortable reading about love busters and love units etc.<p>If you both follow the Dr. Harley's basic concepts, you should be able to remain successful in your marriage. I know that *when* (again, positive thinking) my H and I get back together, I will be coming back here regularly to remind myself of where I've been and to try to offer some help to others who are following a similar path.<p>I haven't had any real signs of progress yet, as a matter of fact my H hasn't yet actually moved out - he now says "next week." But I am going to keep on being positive and keep on my own path of healing ... probably forever, because I know it won't be easy no matter what happens.<p>terri

Great Bruce--Let's hope that absence makes the heart grow fonder. <p>It's good that you know that you have to keep working on the relationship=--even when things appear good. I can relate to the incident with your wife last night. I can feel very UNintimate, but then my husband will actually spend some time with me ANYWAY and of course then I feel much more loving toward him. <br>Also, is this true for everyone else---when my husband and I are busy our relationship works pretty well cause there is NO time for a relationship or intimacy, but when things slow down and we have some down time that we COULD be spending together then that's when everything goes haywire. He doesn't want to spend his down time on our relationship and then I get sad cause we have no relationship and the sadness doesn't go away until i am too busy to notice...