I think I need a little advice. My 17 yo daughter, who's living with a friend, called me tonight to tell me she'd called her dad. (My stbx is not living with me, hasn't for 2 1/2 months. He was served with divorce papers on Thursday and went ballistic, all over $$. No remorse that the marriage is coming to an end after 24 years.)<P>The message on the answer machine at the OW's house says: This is the home of "stbx", OW, and OW's child. Leave a message."<P>Although my D didn't say it bothered her (probably made her mad as he**), I'm sure it does. She told her 2 younger sisters to call the number, and of course, they did. One is 16, the other 10.<P>What kind of thing is this for them to be hearing? My 10 yo is having enough problems. She's sure the OW's D is getting the attention from her dad that she never got. This is a slap in the face for all my kids, and I think they've endured enough from their father.<P>Should I mention it to him the next time he calls, asking for a favor? He was paid on Wednesday, but won't give us a penny. Child support and alimony aren't due until the 15th and I doubt he'll bother to pay it until after the 20th (his next payday). And he's getting it reduced. But he told D on the phone that he'd bring her the money for her drivers license tomorrow. I think he's going to pump her for information about what I'm doing. At the least, he's trying to "buy" her affection. Like she's that dumb!<P>I doubt there's anything I can do, legally, about the money. I'm the one holding off creditors, while he plays house with the OW. All our assets (excluding his paycheck) are tied up in the temporary order. As with most betrayers, his playmate is more important than food for his kids.<P>Sorry this went on for so long. Every time I think I've got a handle on myself, he does something stupid. Does anyone know if this is desertion? I'm in a no-fault state, but I sure wish I could nail him for something. I'm tired of my kids being hurt by their own father.<P>2sad

unfortuantly our leagal systeme does`t give a darn! about your/our emotional state, or the hurt and pain the betrayer causes.. they are only interested in "thier part of the money" <P>It is easier to get out of a marraige, (which involves more then one human life) then to get out of a car contract!!!! This is our justice systeme!!! some one can steal something out of a store, and get arrested and a record for life.. and maybe even jail time, but if an OW?OM steal your spouse thats not even concidered!!! <P>what a world we live in!! I beleive people should all!!!!! have to pay some kind of a consequence for their wrong doings! and some day I hope the old laws of adultry, come back!<P>This no fault crap.. is just that.. a bunch of crap!!! <BR> <BR>they do all kinds of things for addicts.. in this world.. well this is running rampid in our society.. it is time some one fights for the rights of a wife or husbnad...! It is a known fact that consequences deter things from happening.. let the world know this is what will happen, and I know.. we would see a difference.. even if it saved 1/4 of the maraiges, it would be a plus.. <P><BR>AV<P>