Ugh. I am leaving for Florida 8/7 - providing that tomorrow, Monday, the lease goes through. In the mean time, the hubby is now being saccarin sweet, Mr. Promise Keeper - when I try (again) to explain why I am leaving (physical abuse to child, mental verbal and emotional abuse to all of us) he just says "I have done nothing wrong - you are going to have to answer for this." I sometimes think it would be easier for me if he wasn't going to church - he is "saved" enough to bash me with his Bible platitudes and judgementalism. Please pray for me until I am out from under the oppression - especially since I know the most dangerous time for me is when I am leaving. Thanks - notagain

notagain,<BR>I don't know your story but I'll pray for you. Keep posting to all of the people here and they will help you out.<P>Sorry you are having a difficult time but nobody should be abused. I admire you for defending your children. Tess

notagain,<P>Batterers are the most controlling and manipulating people. My H still claims that everytime he hit me, I did something to deserve it. Waking him up to go to work is not doing something to deserve to be choked!<P>Obviously he is not saved enough or he would realize what he has done and ask for forgiveness instead of pushing all the blame on you.<P>Take care,<BR>Mitzi

My first marriage was physically abusive and they always blame someone else other than themselves. That is just the way they work. He was very manipulative and it took me 2 years to realize this.<P>My stbx is not physically abusive but he is emotionally manipulative. Frankly, I am jealous of his selfishness. <P>I think you are doing the right thing to get the children out from under the abuse.<P>I remember waking up with a pillow over my face with his knee on top to hold it on there.<P>I remember being dropped off 400 miles away from home in the middle of the night to fend for myself and find my own way home.<P>You will be better off without the abuse.<P>My ex-H drug me down a paved highway and made me crawl home. We lived way out in the country and I was bleeding really bad.<P>The closest place was HOME and the abuse didn't stop there. I finally called 911 and he held me hostage in the house. <P>They had an ambulance waiting for me. Thank God my son spent the night with my Mother.<P>By 6 that morning, he gave up and they hauled his butt to jail and only kept him for 2 hours.<P>That was my x-H not the stbx.<P>Be careful when you leave. Think your plan through so that you all get out safely.

Thank you all for your replies - the support and the REALITY helps. I have told my 15yr old to be careful and not talk to the husband about the situation - the H insists he is "never angry, never yells" and I am sure he sees himself like that. He is sick and it is a sick environment. Pray that the lease is approved tomorrow! Today I keep packing - thanks for your prayers and I will keep you posted!<P>------------------<BR>In His Grip - llp