Since it was raining on Sat, x did not take son to Lake Erie, and did drop daughter off at around 2. She was supposed to come in the morning. Upon getting home, she said she needed to get another pair of shorts for the bball camp. I asked why she didn't get them with her mother, she said she didn't know where to get them. So I took her and got a pair.<P>We went to d's softball game and s was not there. I asked d where her brother was, and she said he was staying overnite at a friends.<P>After game d said she was hungry and hadn't eaten since breakfast, it was 8pm. So I took her out to eat and she ate every bit of salad and also ate a steak and we split desert.<P>D said she didn't want to go back to x's till Sun before she left for bball camp, so she stayed Sat nite.<P>SO I called my s at his friend's house to say good night. I left a message on the service. At midnite, I get a phone call from the friend's mother. MY son was not there.<P>What had happened was that my x and om had been calling the friend trying to buy a car her husband was selling. Well they just showed up. The woman said she was shocked at how ugly and rude the om was. He was trying to pressure the woman into selling thr car for less than what they were asking. She said she was very unnerved by om.<P>My s stayed and some sort of arrangements were made for the woman to drop my son off at his mothers. When she did later, om came out, told her to move her car, then mumbled that he was leaving. S ran into house and found that x wasn't there. This mad the woman angry, she said she wasn't going to leave my s alone or with om. So she took him home.<P>Unfortunetly, she lost it and verbally attacked my x in front of my son, telling him what she though of my x and om and asked him all the questions that we would like too but don't.<P>So on Sun when x dropped the kids off, 1 hour late after making a big deal what time to bring them back,(she took them shopping to get daughter shorts. I told it it was weird), she clamly told me what happened. I think she must have doubled her anti-deps or Xantac because she was more calm than I ever saw her. I told her the woman appologized to me and she seemed to accept that.<P>I will try to get the woman to appologize to my son. He says he hates her. She is a flake.<BR>My son asked me if i agreed with some of the thing she said. I said yes.<P>As x was about go leave, d asked for some money. X looked at her and said she should get a job like babysitting or cutting grass. She did give her $20. So I loaded up my car with 3 girls and my stiff and all their stuff and took them to bball camp.<P>X has not called to see how thing went. I didn't call her last night because she "had plans" and figured wasn't at home.<P>Now the weird thing. A woman friend I have been emailing with, responded to an email I sent her. Her last few emails had unnerved me, as she keep saying she missed my voice, I talked to her and her husband 1-2 last July and she had started ending her email with Love. So I cooled things for a while and emailed her last week to see how she was doing and said I thought I was going to find her on my doorstep.<P>Well, she replied back that I didn't know how close she was to doing that. She is having trouble with her husband, working 2 jobs, drinking, their college age son, DUI and excessive speeding and leaving for second year in college, and their youngest son who was busted for selling his Ritalin at his summer job. The charges were reduced and he is looking at probation and community service. The father wanst to fight all these things and no make the kids face the music.<P>So she asked me if I though it would be a good idea for her to come out and visit me! I haven't replied to her. I guess I don't know how to tell her NO, NO, NO.<P><BR>

Man o man. <P>You couldn't write this stuff, you know? Nobody would believe it. I've had a few of these type of experiences. We should collect all of our stories, and publish them.<P>I have to ask, are you going to ask the woman to apologize to your son for what she said, or for having the scene in front of your son? I see a big difference. I know I don't like to have my kids exposed to stuff like that, but on the other hand, sure nice to know she cared for your son's well being, and wouldn't just drop him off, without his mother being there. A good parent's anger at shabby parenting can get very emotional. I would guess too that your son is very hurt hearing anything bad about his mother, even more so if he feels the same way and is guilty for that - do you think there is any displaced anger on his part?<P>And it sounds to me like real trouble if that woman comes to see you. Like a plot developing similar to Fatal Attraction or something. Suspect she will latch on to you - recognizes you are a very good man - and boy does she sound needy and clingy right now. I think a NO NO NO! sounds pretty good...

AAAAAAAAIIIIIIYYYYYYYEEEEEEEE!<P>RUN, RUN, RUN!<P>Drop it & don't talk to her again.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

Geeeeeeeeeeeezzzzzzzzzzzz<P><BR>And I thought I had a rough weekend. It must have been a full moon or something. <P>Hang in there, it always gets worse before it gets better. I am positive of that ! <BR>

Honey,<BR>I think an appology is needed for both the way she expressed things, she said she was swearing. Also for the content. My s (9yo) ends up trying to defend his mother for what I think he knows is wrong. <P>But he still defends her because it is his mother. He gets mad at me if I yell at her and once scolded me for not showing any concern when x was suffering with a cold(like I care). So I don't think it is fair for her or any adult to be put in this situation. She has a bad enough relationship, IMO, with the kids and they don't need anybody else interferring.<P>

You are right. I don't want my kids thinking that is acceptable either. Enough Jerry Springer on TV without seeing it in real life (A show that is NEVER on in my house).<P>My oldest is constantly defending and excusing his father's actions (and inactions). He is 8. Hard to watch them suffer. <P>But he occasionally breaks down and crys about stupid daddy, why he left, then panics that I will tell daddy, and that daddy will be mad. Hard to reassure him that we both love him, and that he couldn't do anything to make us stop loving him. <P>Its so hard. <BR>