This year will be our 16th wedding anniversary and I offered my husband a divorce this morning. He said we will talk later. I asked, "What's to discuss if your answer is yes or no?"<P>I have little strength to put up a fight for this marriage. On one hand, I want to launch out in the deep and divorce him just on suspicion even though he insists he's not having an affair. On the other hand, I watch my daughter light when he comes home from work even though, at age 12, she's aware of what he has done to the family.<P>So, I put off ending the marriage and my rationale is this must be meant by "...for better, for worse..."<P>However, I'll wait to hear what he has to say. I want to end the guessing. <P>------------------<BR>Love hurts no one.<p>[This message has been edited by AGoodPhrend (edited July 24, 2000).]

Hi "friend",<P>I am sorry to hear your confused. You are not sure there is an affair? What is the reason you feel there is one? I have not been posting as much so I missed your post on this possibly.<P>Coming from someone who had an affair and divorce shoved down her face, with no other options, please think long and hard about this.<P>I would like to think that if there is not a huge issue that is out on the table, you two could make this decision slowly and together and with the help of some counseling, maybe you can rediscover your marriage??<P>Sending you strength and prayers, don't give up without a fight unless its really what YOU want! Be strong,<BR>Dana<BR>

Offer a divorce <B>only</B> if you want a divorce. Otherise there should be nothing to discuss about it.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by DanaB:<BR><B>Hi "friend",<P>I am sorry to hear your confused. You are not sure there is an affair? What is the reason you feel there is one? I have not been posting as much so I missed your post on this possibly.<P>Coming from someone who had an affair and divorce shoved down her face, with no other options, please think long and hard about this.<P>I would like to think that if there is not a huge issue that is out on the table, you two could make this decision slowly and together and with the help of some counseling, maybe you can rediscover your marriage??<P>Sending you strength and prayers, don't give up without a fight unless its really what YOU want! Be strong,<BR>Dana</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>My husband has this co-worker who went out of her way to pick him for work. In the meantime, he offered her use of the cellular phone because of her pregnant teen daughter. I asked him couldn't the boy's parents step in? Well, this child's grandmother lives around the corner, so this is not helping me to trust this situation at all. He didn't mention it until after it was done, because he said I would not understand. This is current, but past affairs have taught me signs of someone else in his life. Anyway, the bill is over $600.00. I told him if our daughter wanted to use the cell phone there would have been no way she could have gotten it.<P>In addition, he comes home late from work; stays home for a couple of hours then leave around 10:00p.m. and returns at around 2 or 3 in the morning at least once week. I told him how it looks to me. Well, it doesn't matter, he insists he's not having affair. I told him he has just learned to stick to his lie and not break down and tell the truth.<P>Now, her car is out of commission, her live-in boyfriend said they're working on it. I think he takes whatever she dishes out because he wants to marry her, but she has refused. <P>Meanwhile, every morning at 6:00a.m. my husband picks up his co-worker and goes to get breakfast before going to work. <P>I went a couple of times because I needed to use the car. It's really a long story, but he has contributedly greatly to my suspicious nature.<P>Thanks for your prayers.<P><P>------------------<BR>Love hurts no one.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Chris (CA123):<BR><B>Offer a divorce only</B> if you want a divorce. Otherise there should be nothing to discuss about it.<P><HR></BLOCKQUOTE>I don't want a divorce and I told him I didn't want one. However, he didn't bring the subject up again. I don't know how to take that, but I didn't say anything else about either.<P>Thanks for the advice and your prayers.<P><P>------------------<BR>Love hurts no one.