I'm going to do another of those famous unscientific polls.<P>Will all men who read this thread cast their yes or no vote. If you answer affirmatively, you are not required to provide details though you may if it will help you or others.<P>**********Have you ever been in a relationship, especially a marriage, with a physically abusive woman?************

Thank God... NO.<P>Just Emotional Abusive. Very abusive.

I have not, I hear it happens but I have never been in one myself!

Yes, I have. My current stbx wife would take advantage of the fact that no matter how hard she would push me into a fight, I would not hit her. <BR>She has even screamed at me to do so, and I wouldn't. <P>HOWEVER, she had no quams about coldcocking me whenever she felt like it. She busted my ear drum twice by hitting me in the side of the head. She would scratch me, slap, or just double her fist up and hit me.<P>This didn't happen often in fights, but more than I can count on two hands.<P>Ben

My first girlfriend was abusive to herself, not me. She'd carry a piece of broken glass around with her all the time. It was her "friend" as she said. Needless to say she had a pretty bad childhood.<P>------------------<BR>Prayers & God Bless!<BR>Chris<BR>For relationship info check out <A HREF="http://www.pcisys.net/~chriscal1/resources.html" TARGET=_blank>Marriage & Relationship Resources</A>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Chris (CA123):<BR><B>"My first girlfriend was abusive to herself, not me. She'd carry a piece of broken glass around with her all the time. It was her "friend" as she said. Needless to say she had a pretty bad childhood."<BR></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Chris,<P>My stbx used peices of broken glass and scissors on herself when we first met. She used them to make herself "feel". I attributed this to the drinking, but maybe that isnt what it was from afterall. She also had an awful childhood.<P>Ben

Cinderella,<P>First off hello and welcome back from your weekend! <P>I thankfully can report that you can mark a NO by my name.<P>Been in a relationship with a strong woman (personality I mean) But not physically or emotionally abusive, unless you count being told "I want out of this relationship"<P>anyway long story short, I report a big NO<P>Drew

Hi Ya'll<P>I'm gonna vote no. Ummmmm.....W DID run over my foot with our band van one time. Didnt mean to.....I don't think......<P>Bill

not physical abuse but there was a year or so that I suffered some emotional and mental abuse. She pushed me to the point that I almost hit her and she was dareing me to. I sat down on the couch and cried. I am talking about my STBX this was in '95.<P>Bill

Thanks for your input so far. Keep it up!

No. I've was told that that was the problem with me, that I was controlling, manipulative and abusive. Perhaps I was.<BR>I've changed. I saw the light, but stbx won't give me another go at our marriage. I still love her.

No for me, but during arguements after discovery x kept getting, literally, right in my face. I was suprised that she never did hit me a couple of those times. <P>If she had been a guy, I would have hit her, thats how much she got into my "space."

Cinderella,<P> Well,there was that time she dropped the hammer on my foot,but I don't"think" that was on purpose!<P> So,I guess I'd have to say No.<BR>That goes for me,too.I never laid a hand on her(unless she wanted me to. )<P><BR> ~~Murph

Thank you, guys! If there's anyone I haven't heard from, please speak up.

No

Has everyone had their say?

Ah HAH!<P>Your new BF was in a relationship with a physically abusive woman, and you want to know the side effects? or if it was provoked with violence?<P>Hmmmm good question. You may not know until after the vows, as it usually doesn't show up until after ownership.<P>Have you talked with him about it? have you taken him and raked him over the coals with your friends to get a 3rd party answer?<P>Does he have any scars on his body?<P>hopefully, I am barking up the right tree.<P>By the way, I was slapped once, for a ridiculous reason. Was that physically abusive? <P>thl<BR>

By the way, how do you get along with his family? and using your MB sensitivities, are they normal? would you go out with his Dad?<P>How do they interact?<P>By the way, how long has it been since you have been separated from your X? you may have healed, but have you dated enough?<P>thl

WIFTT,<P>Jeez,Louise. I'm surrounded by men 24-7, and I KNOW you don't consider me healed, realistic, or anything else. What is this encouragement to play-the-field stuff? Are you marking your bedposts to track your progression back to wellness? I could date a zillion men and wouldn't make a d@mned bit of difference if my head wasn't in the right place. My first husband claimed to have sex with over 200 women (which he told me AFTER he married me), and he certainly had no lock on relationship skills.<P>I stay away from men who feel the need to date alot. The "good" ones, IMO, don't surf through women in their quest for self-knowledge. That said, I will leave you alone now. I don't need anymore reminders that there are people out there who have no problems "going through" the opposite sex. I'm a human being, dammit, not fluff to occupy someone's time or relationship fodder in their dating boot camp.

Hey Student,<P>I just wanted to say that I really don't think that WIFTT really means that he is going to "Go through" women to see if he finds the right one!......I think that he just wants to know if you should "date" a lot before you make things serious!.......I think that he is feeling scared that he will jump into another "wrong" marriage (I think that we all feel this way!.....Man, I know that I do!)<P>I jsut wanted you to know that I admire your strength and courage........and more than that but your insight!.....<BR>You hit me in the head w/your response to Sue post and the "chemistry"!....<BR>(I do agree w/you!)<P>I just think that maybe and THL,please don't take this wrong bc I too have thought these exact things.......but maybe that is what it is......."Thinking too much".....Oh,hell,what do I know!<P>Never mind!..........(having some major blonde moments here!) <P>Gina <P><P>------------------<BR>"If we deny love that is given to us,if we refuse to give love because we fear pain or loss,then our lives will be empty,our loss greater!"-----Anonymous----