Sorry for sounding adverserial about questioning your relationship, Drew, it wasn't intended that way, and thanks for the clarification.<P>I appreciate your background, as I too can relate to some of the same parts, although we all try our best at the hardest times, and you shouldn't have any regrets from what I have read from you.<P>IOW, you/I focus on one something we have to do for ourselves/our view of our family, and our S finds "rescue" from other people instead of with us. I have been on both sides of the fence, and it is good/bad if the glue that holds us both together is not very strong. However, we have come back, it was our S that didn't have the long term view of the relationships.<P>It sounds like the glue of the relationship was not as strong as it could have been to hold you two together through the tough times. It sounds like it wasn't necessarily all your glue, but your STBX's glue.<P>Hopefully, you can find a relationship with<BR>much stronger glue, more understanding and support, so that the non-relationship bad times will be supported and not held against you. And if your new S has to go through a similar situation, you can support her and lead her through the rough times having been there done that.<P>good luck and after our parents' pass, I guess we are all really alone and on our own.<BR>We all learn alot about ourselves, and who we are and what we are made of, but mostly what to look for again and what we need.<P>thl

THL,<P>First off thank you Sometimes it takes someone else to make a person think more about their situation(s)! You with your questions yesterday made me think about it again, And everyone else on here that knows me fairly well are GREAT aids in support! So THANKS!!! <P>BTW...I didn't take your line of questioning as adversarial at all. As I said it made me think about how I truly do/did feel!<P>It has been a bummer week off and on for me! And I go through these little streaks that make me re-think things about my STBX. She also does things that I probably read to far into! I do still love her, but I know in my heart that we aren't going to be H & W again! So I will move forward and be as good of a friend to her as I can be or that I can handle at least!<P>So anyway THL, I actually really appreciated your thoughts, views and questions for me yesterday! I think that I will again be ready to get on with life again!<P>I am even taking steps now to jump start this heart and rearrange my life a little! It is going to be a HUGE change for me in an emotional, physical, financial and thoughtful way!<P>My STBX was/still is good to me, maybe I need to put some distance between us to let the initial pain of our divorce behind us. We are both "professional people" she an attorney, me an environmental "whatever" LOL. So with our income together it was comfy, now I need to learn to be much more resourceful!<P>Emotionally and Physically, I need to learn to drop my STBX's needs and NOT compare what she did for me with others, especially another woman that I meet and can share with!<P>That will be the hardest for me by far, much more so then the income! I often think back to when we were broke as heck going through law school and remember even though we were scraping by, WE WERE VERY HAPPY So that tells me that partially money is NOT EVERYTHING cause once we started making it in addition to all the other crap, it got harder!<P>Anyway that is sort of off track! I just wanted to say THANK YOU THL <P>Your questions really made me think. I am off for Sunny and HOT Phoenix this weekend, starting on Friday to interview for work there. That will be a HUGE change for me is something works out, Moving from Omaha, Nebraska to Phoenix AZ (or anywhere for that matter) will be a change. I welcome change though! I look forward to a new start and again to have a wonderful, loving and caring lady to share changes with again!<P>Thanks again THL <P>Drew

Drew, I really don't know your story but you have been great support to me. I pray for you and hope that you will find what you are looking for in a relationship.<P>We will connect sometime as we live very close to each other!

Omaha,<P>That sounds good to me! After this week I hope that it will be better! Then we can hook up.<P>Glad that I am helping out with you by the way! Hang in there okay! You still don't have to give up. I have a feeling that she reacted before thinking. I may be wrong, but she may have!<P>Drew