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Joined: Aug 2000
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I am having more difficulty with pending divorce. Wife and I did some work on the house this weekend to get it ready for sale. Then she left last night to go see a friend and stated she would be home when she got home.<P>I had a problem with this as today was the kids first day of school and she was leaving because she was bored. I stated my feelings ans she said get use to it!<P>Then she said what are you going to do when we have seperate houses and I am out all night?<P>She seems to be trying to hurt me, help!
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Joined: Jun 2000
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<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by hurtinginOmaha:<BR><B>She seems to be trying to hurt me, help!</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>She probably is trying to hurt you. They want you to blow up, and in your anger, do or say something to justify their actions - blindly after the fact, of course, but justify in any case.<P>Minor league advice: act as if you *CAN* live without her. That'll really tick her off. Or, make her think. What choice do you have other than to suffer at her hands?<P>Bama<P>
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Joined: Aug 2000
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Hurting,<BR>I'm sorry your having a hard time now....i have to agree with bama, act "as if"! <BR>work on yourself now! stop worring about what she's going to do, or what she's thinking. WORK ON YOU! <BR>it will get better! you have to work on yourself! do something for YOU!<BR>rizz
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Joined: Aug 2000
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Thanks Ladies, I know what you are saying is right! It is so hard to be patient when she continues to push divorce and now the house will go on the market next week.<P>It is all so sad! She expects me just to be over it (her)if I was mature I would move forward and forget her! I told her last night that divorce is considered one of the most stress events in a person life. Even more than death of a loved one!<P>The grief is difficult to deal with I was with my friends last night who are all married and they were talking about their wives as we always have. It felt terrible!!
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Joined: Sep 1999
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hurtinginOmaha,<P>Grief is a very hard emotion to live through...<P>Have you tried...<BR>...seeing a doctor about medication<BR>...counseling (w/ counselor understanding MB concepts)<BR>...rekindling your faith<P>...These things... in reverse order... is best!<P>...and Oh yehhhh...<P><B>Stay here with us too</B>!<P> ![[Linked Image from marriagebuilders.com]](http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/images/icons/smile.gif) <P>Jim
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Joined: Aug 2000
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Working on faith, I pray like craze. I am in therapy and have a great support network of friends and family.<P>Medication is always a thought and it might happen one of these days. I have been sleeping (except for last night) and my appitite is good.<P>I just miss my wife! She continues in Counseling but I question what her Counselor really does!
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I'm sorry that you are having such a tough time. Your wife is probably doing this to ease HER pain. At any rate, I am here to suggest a support group to you and anyone else on this board that is interested. Check out <A HREF="http://www.divorcecare.com." TARGET=_blank>www.divorcecare.com.</A> It is an entire program, christain based and helps you go through the divorce process with others. The program consists of videos, group therapy, and a workbook. All you need to do in enter your zip code to find a church near you that offers the program It is non-denominational and I have seen it offered at many different churches, Baptist, Methodist, Lutheran, etc. Best wishes and take care of YOU. <P>------------------<BR>Zonie
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Joined: Jul 1999
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Omaha, <BR>My MIL (now XMIL?) once said something to me that really sticks....<BR> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Just because one person stops loving, doesn't mean the other one does... the feelings can last a lifetime.<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><BR>Of course, she was refurring to my X's 1st W, and his feelings toward her, but it still applies. I wonder if she realizes that I am now (although not as much) living those words.... <P>Just a thought<BR>B<BR>
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