My wife and I have been seperated now for a month. Over the past weeks we have had a few conversations, all of which she has stated she isn't coming back to me as a "couple". I guess the important thing thing that she said was that I was her best friend and hoped that I would be there for her and that she does need me but as a couple were over. Does this make any sense to any of you?<p>The past couple of days, she has called me up and asked me to go shopping with her for our son. We seem to be having a good time with no tension anymore. We laugh, she talks about her work, I talk about mine. Very cordial, fun and normal conversation. She even called me "sweetie", "baby", etc. I dont know if this is habit or she means it. I just dont know.<p>Last night, we were at a local mall and I made mention that Santa was there for pictures. She said that she would like to take our son to get his picture taken. I asked if I could go along when she does and she stated that anything that has anything to do with our son she would always want me to be there. <p>I am confused about what to do. It seems that she has her mind made up that we are done as husband and wife. It seems that backing off of her has helped her clear her head about her personal life but it seems that her mind is made up about us.<p>Anyone have any ideas?

Kstedman,<p>Well having that type of relationship with your wife would abviosly be very painful. Im not so sure I would continue to just be there for your wife everytime she needs you for other things. If seems like she really needs a reality check, and is taking things to lightly. Doesnt she realize that ending a marriage can be devestating to a spouse. She has left you holding all the pieces of your marriage, yet she wants you to be her best friend and just be there for her...like everything is o.k. I would sugest that you give some space between the two of you. Your wife needs to deal Head On ! with the choices that she is making. Even though you have great hopes of her comming back to you, she needs to determin what she wants. Having a child together can make it hard, but you need to get strong for yourself and your son. And hopefully things will work out for the best. Hand in there......Give it to the Lord!!!<p>[This message has been edited by violet (edited 11-24-98).]

Well I have been thinking about your situation for a fews hours since I made the last reply. I would like to add that its o.k to have this type of relationship with your wife..even though she wants the marriage to end. Its better to get along then not to get along. If its continualy causing you to feel pain when your with her, then I certainly would hold back and give yourself some space away from your wife.She may not realize what she is putting you through.