maybe some support to go along with it! I wonder how many of you remember my triangle of a story? I hardly recognize the names around here, but some are still familiar.<P>My small update: I've found a job that I like (sort of). Right now it's only part time, but in January it will go to full time. Having not worked in 18 years I can't say I'm happy that I'm in the working world. I much better enjoyed being a PTA mom. Oh well, that's the reality of divorce though. The judge's orders said I had to find work and since I hold accounting degrees, I'm capable of earning a living. Besides, my kids are not young ones (17 & 15). Once the oldest graduates from HS next year, xh's child support will be reduced. His alimony to me has been reduced by about 60% due to my working and the amount of time he and Mia have the kids. Oh, yes, they are still together. Unfortunately I wish I could say that I see the "fog" as you all call it fading, but with them I doubt there was truely ever "fog". They are quite happy living in the house that used to be mine. When we divorced, my H bought out my 1/2 of the community property to the home so he could keep it. At least the kids still had the same bedrooms. But what I didn't know then, that I know now is that Mia GAVE him the money to buy out my share. UGGGHHH!!! He in turn changed the title to the property and put her as "joint owner". Doesn't that just irk the living daylights out of you! Nothing I can do about that now - or then for that matter. Just bothers me.<P>I still hold some anger and resentment towards Mia and my H for everything that went on last year. In retrospect, I would not have gone on as long as I did "hoping" and "wishing" that we could salvage our marriage. I believe in all honesty that once the affair was brought out into the open, and since he never really "left" Mia (at least his love for her never faded), the marriage was truely over. Hoping the marriage could be saved just kept the wound open longer than I would have liked.<P>So, that's it in a nutshell. I am grateful everyday that I found this place and met some wonderful friends along the way....especially Sheryl. <BR>

Hey You ,<P>So, I hop on over here and see your name... had to come on in to read, and what do I see? My name! My gosh, TL, you are so sweet! I still lurk, even though I probably shouldn't... and there are days, weeks even, when I don't happen by. I'm so glad I saw this today though. You've made my day.<P>As far as your posting though... my dear TL, look how far you've come! You are making the best out of a really blech situation, and you're still doing okay. Not great yet, but so much better, my dear friend. <P>I'm so sorry he bought out your half of the house. That's got to hurt like hell. I know you're kids get to keep their rooms, but I don't even see how he and Mia can live where you and he used to live. David and I both agree on that one! Neither of us wants the house...too many memories!<P>I'm so happy that you're hanging tight and being strong... and living your life with integrity. You can be proud of yourself!<P>Lots of BIG HUGS <P>Sheryl

Hey back Sheryl:<P>Mia & ex-H have begun MAJOR remodeling and a huge 2nd story addition. There is only 4 years left of the note of the home. I hear that the plan is to only stay there until the remodel is complete, then sell. It should net them both some very nice money with so very little left on the loan. At the least, he'll probably return her original investment.<P>It's still very painful to see. He never wanted to add on, let alone do anything to upgrade that house. Guess Mia has some major influence on him. In a way, I guess in this situation, I would want to to the same. Funny how things turn out, huh?

Hey Tired Lady,<P>I tried to reply to you last night however when I submit the reply it wouldn't let me. And then the the forum was unavailable after that. Anyways, I haven't forgotten about you either!! I did follow your story and have been wandering how have you been. I come around a little moe often now, but I took a few months off myself. Man alot has changed for you. <P>I think its totally understandable that you still feel some anger and resentment. I think we all do to some extent. However its important that you work on that so that you can heal, which seems to be what you are doing anyways. I know that I still feel anger and resentment as well. It's hard TL, but from what it sounds like, you seem to be doing a fine job. You are a strong woman, don't forget that. <P>I too would be angry about the house thing. I don't see how the OW could stand it. No amount of remodeling in the world could change the fact that it belonged to you and him first. Let's just hope your ghost/spirit haunts her at night. Okay, okay maybe not that. It's just the bitterness in me coming out.<P>hugs and prayers to you....<P>------------------<BR><B>Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...Courage to change the things I can...And the wisdom to know the difference.</B><P>lady_divine77@yahoo.com