Wife who is divorcing me called to tell me her farther had a stroke. My first reaction is to go to her side to lend support but I am not sure this is appropriate.<P>I also have teacher conferences today, which I will attend, but what do I do with regards to my father in laws stroke?<P>I told her I would do what ever was needed!

That's all you can do. Don't know how old your kids are (I know you have some), but see that they're looked after.<P>I read you moved out. I hope it doesn't hurt later trying to get your children.<P>Did OM move in to YOUR house yet?<P>Jay

Go to the conferences. Go to the hospital. Lend wife your support. Lend even more to M-I-L. Be available. Spend extra time with the children. Offer to have them with you as much as possible. You do want custody, right? (They won't die from sleeping in sleeping bags on the floor. Mine have done it at x's for 5 years.) Go by hospital often. But don't live there. Treat it naturally. That's my opinion.

hurtinginOmaha,<P>Very often in life you only get on chance to do the right thing for a person. In this case your FIL and MIL would appreciate your support. Perhaps your W will also. This isn't about the divorce or the marriage. This is about doing the right thing for people you like and love.<P>Do it and do it well.<P>God Bless,<P>JL

I am doing the right thing and supporting everyone. I went to conferences and I am going to get joint custody. I am spending as much time as possible with the boys.<P>I is very hard not to be with them!<P>Thanks for the input! God Bless

I know that feeling. My stbxh just told me his grandmother passed away. The problem in our relationship is that my in-laws and I have not seen one another for a year as they clearly did not support me in my marriage. They do things I don't agree with and do not want to be around. I finally put my foot down and in the last 11 months of trying to see if my marriage could work, I decided to have nothing to do with them. I'd like to give him my support, but it could just make matters worse.<P>If you are on good terms (I don't know your history) then by all means, stop in, help your wife. I am sure taking the boys or making sure they get where they need to be and things like that will help more than you know and it has it benefits for you too. It's hard to stop the spouse relationship and move to trying a strickly friendly approach isn't it?