My husband and I have been married for 4yrs and we have a BEAUTIFUL 3yr old daughter. Things have not been working lately (about 6months). He says that my moods are always changing and he never knows what to expect. I have been going through alot with my job lately. One of my students threatened my life and I had to file a police report. His response to that was nothing. My twin sister has been with us since May. She does close on her house on the 18th. I have just had alot of stress and he cannot handle it. I feel that he does not care anymore. Last night in bed he told me that he was tired of trying, he was not happy anymore with me or us, and that he was basically giving up. What do I do??? I come to work in tears, go home in tears, and fall asleep in tears. My daughter asked me this morning if daddy was mad at mommy and if he still loved us. I love this man more than anything and I do not want to give up. But if he is not going to do anything, what do I do?? My e-mail address is listed at home. I do not fel that my school corporation would appreciate me receiving this mail at work. Plus my aide is nosy. I hope someone can help by giving me advice. I do not know how much longer I can feel this way. Thanks!!<br>Jodi <br>

Hi Jodi, Im so sorry that you are feeling this way. Your husband sounds like he has reached a point were he is at his end. One good thing to look at, is that he told you. He could have bottled it up but he did tell you. Now, we have to do something. Can your sister watch your 3 yr old? You and your husband need to spend a couple of hours alone. Really let him know that you need and want him and want to know what you can do to make him feel more wanted. Have you considered switching jobs? Im not sure why he doesnt act worried when you said your life was threatened!!That is bothersome to me. I do think that maybe you should take some time off to let things cool down at school and you could ask you husband to spend some time with you alone. It kind of sounds like you are at a hit and miss. Does he work alot? It is bad also for your baby, you know she knows something is up. I think the first step is communication. Ask him to meet you somewhere, make him promise, so you can talk. I wish I had more helpful things to say...just hang in there for now...and see why he feels like he does. Good luck

Nancy,<br> Thanks! Every little bit helps. My sister has been willing to watch my daughter, as weel as my parents. He works in Chicago on Michigan Avenue, on the most famous corner, in a tall beautiful building. So yes he does work alot of hours. I have tried to get together, but I do not know if he is even willing to do so. I would like to do something this weekend, so I will give it a try. Thanks again!<br>Jodi

Jodi,<p>I'll suggest that you read everything here, and see if your husband will too. Try getting 'Give and Take' and both read it.<p>It sounds like you're catching your problems early enough (I hope). If you don't, an affair by one party is usually the end result. Hop over to "infidelity" to see the results of that. You can still successfully save your marriage, but it's much harder, and the hurt is so much more intense.<p>The Harley rules are: the Rule of Protection (eliminating lovebusters), the Rule of Care (meeting emotional needs), the Rule of Time (spend time with each other), and the Rule of Honesty (complete and total honesty. There are lots of great pieces of practical advice here and in the books to put your marriage into this 'framework'. And the results can be astounding!

K,<br>Thanks for the advice! I really do appreciate everyone's help. It means alot to me!! <br>Jodi