I have been married 21 years last April and my wife and I have a 16 year old son.In August of last year she told me she didnt know if she wanted to be married anymore. Oct 18th of last year she moved out of our house. In Dec I recieved divorce papers,notice of custody and support hearings<BR>and a restraining order. After everthing was said and one I have custody of our son and we live in the home. No one is paying support and she has a restraining order on me till Dec 20th.<BR> I love this women so much but she has refused to counciling or trying to restore our marraige.I have rededicated my life to the Lord, he is my strength to continue on. I love my wife more than anything in this world and do not want this divorce.<BR> My son and I are closer than we have ever been and Im trying to keep his life as normal as I can. My wife still seems so distant after 1 year separated and it doesnt look like she has any interest in restoring our marraige. A 2 year separation in PA you are granted a divorce.Is ther any way I can restore this marraige? I have tried to be humbl,loving and caring but she is so negative toward me. I need to have her trust again. I have tried to let go and have very little conversation with her other than talk about our sons well being.What do I do, is there any hope. She is the women I love and I cant get over the pain we are both in. What do I do, help!<BR>Rick <BR>

{{{{{{{{{{Rick 21}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Wish I had some advice, but all I can do is say hang in there. I have done a lot of praying and basically asked for "peace" I still want my H to stay, but after a lot of soul searching and prayer I have come to terms with the fact that it is in God's hands that only He knows what is right and that He will will give me the strenth to accept His decision.

[/B][/QUOTE]hi rick,<BR>21 years is a long time to be married to someone and i'm sorry to hear that your wife left you,but i'm also happy to hear that you have your 16yr old son....at 16 yrs old i think that your son needs you more and i think that god knows that you still loves here too....all it takes is prayer constantly reading the bible and have faith nick that she will be back she's probably going through some changes, but i know that it hurts you very much......try contacting her and talk to her and let her know how much you do want to save your marriage and i don't think that you should file for a divorce whose to say things might change for the better....... if you need conversation and a friend email diamondpurity@hotmail.com<P>------------------<BR>liz

rick 21,<P>Pray. You can't ask for God to change your wife's mind - that deals with that pain in the butt thing we call free will! It is such a gift, but at the same time it can be used to hurt ourselves and others. <P>What you can pray for is to ask God to help you become a better person - ask Him to help you learn from what seems like a terrible time in your life. Remember that Abraham waited years/decades before he was granted the son he prayed to God for.<P>My wife has only been gone 7 months, but I am trying to use this time to take a serious look at "who I am". Kind of like an early life re-evaluation of me!<P>And finally, my counselor told me a long time ago that the trust and love my wife lost for me, did not just occur over time. The pain and anger had been growing for a few years. He said that I needed to remember that it may take just as long for her to forgive and to be open to trusting again.<P>So my advice - pray for patience.<P>In the mean time, I will say a little prayer for you and your wife!<P>Mike