I haven't seen anything posted from you two in a while and was just checking to make sure everything was ok with you.<P>Mike, have you received the papers yet and if so, are you doing alright?<P>I had dinner with my STBX last week and for the first time since all of this began, I can honestly say that I am ready to let go and am looking forward to moving on. I just saw things in a different light when I was with her the other night. Sure I still love her, but I went over witohout my 'blinders' and I was really able to see some things that had bothered me for a few years. Actually, they hit me like a ton of bricks! <P>Anyway, I was just checking in. <P>Take care.

Hey,<P>Yes I am still around! Turned 30 on Friday. "funny I don't feel tirty..."<P>The weekend went a lot better than I thought it would. Never did get any papers yet. Don't really know the process? She wrote that she signed the complaint two Thursdays ago. But she is in FL, so I guess they had to be mailed back to her attorney, then whatever he has to do to get them into my hands.<P>I have actually tried to put some comedy into going to the mailbox at lunch. Trying to take the edge off for when they finally arrive. Then again maybe she has reconsidered!!! Yeah, right.<P>Replied to some other posts here today - take a look to see what else is new!<P>I am both sorry and happy to hear about your dinner (is that possible?). Jayhawk, we just never know what is in store for us........<P>I had a realization late last week that you may appreciate (with a little bit of God thrown in!):<P>Usually when you hear about people falling in-love with their spouses, it is some kind of unexpected incident - Usually unplanned and "out of the blue". Also the few success stories I have heard about where couples get back together and reconcile, also are "out of the blue" occurences - kind of like one day the wayward spouse woke up and "saw the light". <P>I thought to myself, if that is the case, then nothing I do right now is going to change that. No matter how much I worry or fret.<P>God will give us what is best for us - we just need to wait and not try and make predictions - that will only drive us batty. I am beginning to trust in that "LOVE" will come back to me one day - whether it is with my wife or with someone new, it will come. I'm in no hurry, I remember how good it feels, I can wait. I can pray for it to be with her, but I need to trust in God's plan for my life.<P>Just my thought for the week!<P>Mike

Jayhawk,<P>Sorry. Have been around, but haven't visited for a while. Been working, going to the gym, socializing, and getting on with my life. Feel great. If you really want to know 'wassup, get ready for my next post.<P>Eric

Well, I'm neither of the people you were addressing but I did read the thread.<P>Mike, I love the idea of love returning to me. Someday,.......<P><BR>(Sigh)<P>-Cinderella<BR>

cinderella,<P>It will come... I promise. Look at me, last night I got my divorce papers in which I was basically portrayed as a "caveman" and still I have hope. Not so much for me and my wife, but for love. I guess you can say I am a hopeless romantic because I always end up taking the brunt when relationships end. I have been thinking about why that is and I came up with an answer: I just keep giving myself to whoever it is I love. I try always to keep fear out of it.<P>Several people here posted that they don't know if they can ever love like they did, again. I KNOW I can not only love the same, I can love better - for I can learn from my mistakes. That is what I have been trying to get through to my wife for so long now: Yes I messed up (and so did she), but here we are now - lets give "us" another chance. One last time.....<P>In the end I don't know what will happen, but I think it is better off that we don't. Garth Brooks has a song called The Dance: <P>------------------------------------<BR>"Looking back, on the memory of the Dance we shared, 'neathe the stars above. For a moment all the world was right. How could I have known, that you'd ever say goodbye. <P>And I, I'm glad I didn't know....The way it all would end. The way it all would go. Our lives, are better left to chance. I could of skipped the pain, but I'd had to miss the dance.<P>Holding you, I held everything. For a moment, wasn't I the king. If I'd only known, how the king would fall, then who's to say, you know I might have changed it all..."<BR>-----------------------------<P>Those words mean so much to me right now...<P>Mike