Hi everyone!!!<P>Last week I finally got served the big D papers. Emotionally, I've been doing real well and I've been expecting it would happen sooner or later, but it still came as a bit of a shock when I finally got them. My sorrow lasted a few hours and then my resolve returned.<P>Yesterday, I packed up all of my H's personal stuff -- threw it into boxes and bags -- set it out on the front porch and called him to come and get it. I told him I didn't want him stopping by anymore, I would just forward his mail. When he got here I asked him for the house key, mailbox key and garage door remote. He gave me everything but the house key saying he was keeping it while he was making the house payment. I said "whatever" (not telling him I had already changed the locks ). <P>So it is over. And I'm ready for it to be over. I've made new friends and re-discovered my self-worth and I was not getting an ounce of that from HIM! You know, it felt good to get his stuff out. I was actually happy about it -- I'm ready to move on.<P>Support group plan is moving right along. First meeting scheduled for the 21st and the response has been fantastic. Unfortunately, from my own perspective, I will not be working toward marriage restoration. I just hope I don't set a bad example .<P>Have a great day, y'all!!<P><P>------------------<BR>Love and Prayers,<BR>KristyAnn<P>If I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 1CO 13:2

Hi Kristy,<P>Sorry to see you over here. I know how hard you tried. I'm sorry that it didn't work out, but you were very strong for a long time. <P>I never imagined the feeling of the weight lifting off me untill I let go. It still hurts from time to time, but it does get better. <P>{{{{{{{{{{KristyAnn}}}}}}}}}}<P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain and makes the sun come out again

Hi Nick,<P>It's great to hear from you. Thank you so much for your thoughts and hugs. I'm really feeling pretty good. Like you said, a weight has been lifted. I have so much life ahead of me and I was getting tired of being mired down in a hope for something that could never be. I'm free now -- and I'm happy. Very happy. <P>I hope that your days continue to get better, too. I'm sorry I haven't been around much. I'd really like to come back and help others and I'm sure I will once my life settle back into some sort of a normal routine. Take care of yourself.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Love and Prayers,<BR>KristyAnn<P>If I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 1CO 13:2

KA,<P>Well, I am sorry for this happening to you. I wish our advice had been able to help you. However, it seems as if you are doing as well as can be expected. That is very good to see/hear. <P>Take care and keep posting. <P>God Bless,<P>JL

Dear JL,<P>No amount of advice could have changed my H's mind. He is bent on getting D and that is that. But don't think that your advice hasn't helped <B>me</B>! Without you and the other wonderful people here, I would be nowhere near as complete with this as I am. This process, though painful, has helped my heart to heal and find the me that has been lost for so long.<P>As I look back on the last couple of years, I know now that I was in denial about where my marriage (and my H) was headed. I recall times when I had suspicions, things just weren't quite right, but I repressed those thoughts because I believed I could trust him. From what I've put together and heard from others, I now believe that he has been catting around on me for quite a long time.<P>He's not very well thought of by some of our friends that I would have never guessed didn't like him -- but they knew things that I didn't. One even asked my 17 y.o. son if the "[censored]" was out of the house yet. My kids are actually glad that he's gone -- my 17. y.o. literally hates him and my 15 y.o. thinks he's a jerk. They feel this way in spite of my defending him, saying I forgive him, etc. <P>It's better this way -- I know that now. Some marriages aren't meant to be saved and mine was one of them. I'm happy now, JL, <B>truly</B> happy! I have so much life ahead of me, I hardly know what I want to do first!<P>Be happy for me, JL. I'm free to live fully and more joyfully.<BR><P>------------------<BR>Love and Prayers,<BR>KristyAnn<P>If I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 1CO 13:2

I liked how you signed that last post. "Love and Prayers". Those are two of the keys to survival through this, in my opinion.

KA,<P>well congratulations on your new life! I am in awe of your efforts to start a support group. you are doing very well for KA, keep up the good work. the truth will set you free.<P>tom<BR>

KA,<P>If you are happy, then I am happy. <P>It does seem as if you have come to grips with this whole thing and have a path that you are excited about. That is good, very good. <P>Hope we will still see your smiling face around here from time to time.<P>God Bless,<P>JL