Thank you for your recent posts.<BR>I've had some really awful police officers in the past. I actually feel anger towards the whole system at times.<BR>I had officers bluntly tell me that there is no sense in pressing charges because he owns the house i had exclusive possesion on. So even though he broke a judges order they advise against it.<BR>I've had officers tell me that this is the father of my child so i should think about it.<BR>I even had an officer tell me that it would be in my best interest not to pursue.<P>Most of my complaints aren't even registered because the officers never finished the paper work so there isn't a record.<P>I was really feeling depressed that there was no hope, and that Rick could get away with anything.<P>But on June 28th the officer that came out was very tactful and blunt which helped me to follow through.<P>thanks.<P>

Hi rtn2,<P>Thankyou for your kind words. What you describe very accurately describes the experience of our department until a couple of years ago. Spousal abuse was winked at. We got a new Police Chief named John Timoney. He incorporated an idea first tried out in Norfolk, VA where they decided to go after spousal abuse with a vengance, and cut their homicide rates in half. We started on the idea a couple of years ago, and dropped from over five hundred homicides a year to under three hundred. Hopefully, we will see spousal abuse taken seriously nationwide and worldwide.<P>I am really touched by your words, and I hope others read that thread. We not only deal with those problems professionally, we face all those same problems in our relationships too. <P>Thinking of you,<P>Bumper

rtn2,<P>I am sorry that you had to experience that. I am also especially sorry that appropriate actions weren't taken in the beginning. I think that you are doing the right thing for yourself and especially your daughter. I not only say this form a professional standpoint, but also growing up in a home seeing my mother abused. It is very terrifying for a child and they feel helpless and defenseless. Then they become angry and what to "save" mommy, but only in retrn the abuse gets directed towards them(the child). <P>I am happy the officer that came to your house on the 28th restored some of your faith in the system. I can't speak for the entire system, but some of us do care and still are human. <P>Prayers for you and yours..........<P>------------------<BR><B>Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...Courage to change the things I can...And the wisdom to know the difference.</B><P>lady_divine77@yahoo.com

<BR>It isn't always easy that's for sure.<BR>Your welcome and thank you.<P>As a child i saw a lot of abuse verbally and physically. Today they wonder why i am so angry. (GO FIGURE!)<P>I think seeing that abuse take place and my mom still never acknowledging that it did infact take place....created a lot of hurt and anger within me. I am also starting to believe that this is why i chose Rick and stayed for too long.<P>Rick not only hurt me physically but mentally to this very day.<P>2 months ago he flipped on our daughter when she gave him a hard time about tsaking a bath. He called her dirty face and told her to never touch him and that she stank. (excuse the slang and improper english).<P>This is when we were spending together, she expressed wanting to leave his house and instead of seeing how hurt she was... Rick yelled at her good go home with your mother at my house there are rules and standards unlike your mothers house. I stayed there that night and i knew soon afterward it was wrong because i should of picked her up and walked out. I will not allow him to treat her with such disregard.<P>I tell her all the time she's great at things she does and without study and effort she would fail and this is why it's so important to work at things. I tell her to express herself and emotions never hit or throw things. I also tell her that no matter what takes place in her life she can always come to me and if nothing else i will do my best to help.<P>The other day while poutting away laundry.. she told me she hates her dad. I felt bad for because he messed up so badly. My daughter is awesome at everything she touches, she works hard, and is self discplined now. <P>I tell her all the time that i am proud.<BR>She told me the other day it was okay if i wnated to have a boyfriend because then he could do things with us and we could be a family.<P>I thank her counsellor's because now as an adult woman she'll never (hopefully) feel the anger i do sometimes, but she'll really think things through.<P>thanks for listening! (reading lol)