<BR>[This message has been edited by slowlerner (edited 12-28-98).]<p>[This message has been edited by slowlerner (edited February 16, 2000).]

dear slow,<br>Run don't walk to the droctor's. Do it now. Do not worry about money. You need some very serious help. You will not be able to save your marriage nor pick yourself up without help from some anti-depressions. You have not avoided depression for the last months. It is just getting worst. It is your mind telling you that you have a problem. Please get help then worry about your marriage. Show your wife that you think highly enough of her and the children to get help for your problems quit fantazing that you will get better on your own. You need to go to the dr. now. The sooner you start the sooner your life can begin again with or without your wife. You need to go now.

Dear Slowlerner:<p>Rusty is right you have to go to the doctor pronto! Tell yourself you are worth the effort, because you really are. Your priority in life is to love yourself and look after yourself. You deserve it, you deserve the best in life and it doesn't always come to us, but we can sure as heck go and get it. <p>You may not have received the miracle that you were looking for, but may be your wife did as much as she was capable of at that time in inviting you over. DOn't wait until the invite is exactly as you had hoped or fantasized. Take any opportunity you can to go and see your wife and children. But, you need to start thinking about yourself first and fixing yourself. Clinics can help people who can't afford a visit normally. There are options for repaying, etc. Also, St.John's Wort is a natural herbal anti-depressant and you can buy it in a health food store without seeing a doctor. The more people you talk to about this the more help you will receive.<p>LOOK AFTER YOURSELF, YOU"RE WORTH IT! Do so for you and for your children.<p>ACT NOW! BE GOOD TO YOURSELF!<p>Good luck, we all care out here!<p>Fionn

Thanks.<p>[This message has been edited by slowlerner (edited February 16, 2000).]

slowlerner,<p>Self-medication isn't appropriate in your situation. You need to get to a doctor and get yourself on one of the 'modern' antidepressants like Prozac, Zoloft (SSRI's) or Wellbutrin. You don't need to go to a psychiatrist to get these prescriptions: a GP or family doctor can do this. If you're having problems affording it, see if a clinic doctor will prescribe these meds, and find out if they can 'supplement' you with some samples.<p>St. John's wort may be effective in some cases, but it's not a 'proven' antidepressant. If you can't take the above advice (which I strongly recommend), you can take St. John's wort, but give it at least a two month trial. And remember that this time of your life is going to be "up and down" plenty; even if you are on anti-depressants. They're not happy-pills, but they should help alleviate the overwhelming sense of helplessness that is a trademark of severe depression.<p>