Okay. For months now, almost a year, I have avoided listening to our song on the radio because I didn't think I'd be able to take it. There were two songs that meant something to me: "Somewhere Out There" (which you don't hear on the radio too often) and "Unchained Melody" (the lyrics start off, "Oh, my love, my darling I've hungered for your touch a long, long time..."). That was my song for how I felt when he left.<P>Anyway, today "Unchained Melody" came on the radio, and I let myself listen to it. Now I'm all weepy. Why does it take such a little thing to totally throw me off track? It's not fair! A little song should not upset me this much!<P>(deep sigh)<P>Well, how long did it take you all to be able to listen to "your song"? I really like that song, but the words just mean too much!<P>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

{{{{{{{{{{{CJ}}}}}}}}}}}}}<BR>It's been 20 months since our first separation... 16 months since I moved out... and 10 months since the D was final. I still feel a tug at my heart when I hear "our song".... Usually, I still change the station. <P>I was going through my movies last week, and I came across our wedding video.... it had our "church" wedding and then after that.... it had our "run-away" wedding. He made that for me for our 5th wedding anniversary... I put it back, all the way in the back of the cabinet... maybe someday, I'll actually watch it again.<P>Anyhoo... you are not alone, and it does take some time.<P>Thoughts & Prayers & Smooches!<BR>Flutterby

<B>{{{{{{{{{{CJ}}}}}}}}}}</B><P>You know, I don't have an "our" song so to speak, but sad songs about relationships really bum me out sometimes too. The song "Love" absolutely trashes me out.<P>I guess the song makes you cry, because you're still hurting CJ. I can't tell you if you'll ever be able to listen to it again for sure, but somehow, I suspect you will someday.<P>You help so many people in here that it means alot to me to try and give you some words of encouragement. Remember, we're all on that roller coaster. It's kind of a good thing that our ups and downs are not synched. Otherwise, we'd never be able to help each other out.<P>It takes time CJ. No one knows how long. I suspect until the pain is gone. But by that time you will have been healed for awhile.<P>Take care CJ... read my signature...<P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain and makes the sun come out again

CJ,<P>The first time I heard "our" song, Shinning Star by The Manhattans, was the day after D-Day...It almost killed me. The lyrics well...<BR>She didn't live up to the song, because she left me lonely<P>Now it doesn't phase me at all...And I still like the song.<P>Bill

I used to feel like we had missed something because we had no song. Now, I think that's a wonderful thing. <P>There are two songs that are real triggers for me, though. "Have You Ever Loved A Lady" because I don't think he has. I don't really feel like he ever loved me. I think he was in love with the idea of being in love. and "You Hurt Me" by the Eurythmics. One Sunday, in the waning stages of our life together, everytime we got in the car, that song came on - he had the cassette in. While he swore it was an accident, I never believed him.