.<p>[This message has been edited by Trapped Mom (edited March 25, 2001).]

He's probably feeling badly about what's going on. He's trying to make you feel bad. The truth is you aren't perfect (But who is?). And he knows how to push your buttons. Heard the same thing from my x and he never put up a fight for the children (thank God).<P>It's just another way for him to try to tear you down and build himself up. Don't let him do it.<P>Meanwhile, back on the ranch - get some counseling for your children. If your medical insurance won't cover it, talk to your county mental health agency or something like Family & Children's Services which is a private social service agency found in many places. It may be that even through your local M.H. office your medical ins. will pay enough to make it most affordable. But don't skimp. They need a safe, noninvolved person to tell them it will be ok and that both their parents will always love them and they didn't cause this.<P>And get the stbx to pay if you can.<P>But that is my protective mother-self talking. I mean it all just may have said it too aggresively.<BR>

Many counselors are just as screwed up as the WS - as a matter of fact, many counselors are WS's. Too many times people go into the counseling field for the wrong reasons. Far too many counselors think divorce is just fine and dandy for everyone. <P>NO ONE should tell the children that their parents do or don't love them. Only the mother and father can answer that question for herself or himself. It is quite possible that the WS does not know what love is, as our daughter pointed out. <P>If you are honest with the kids about why the WS left, they do not blame themselves. I think it is mainly in cases where parents are vague about the reasons for divorce that the kids come up with that as a possible reason. <BR><p>[This message has been edited by Nellie1 (edited December 12, 2000).]

Trapped...<P>I hate when my stbxh condemns me too...it drives me nuts..it's like..excuse..who died and made you God??