I've been curious for a while: what do your names mean? There are some interesting ones here. Anyone care to explain?<P>Mine, GSD, stands for German Shepherd Dog, my passion and my hobby. I like the sport of dog training and protection work. <P>("HeyI'mlonelyandmyhusbandleftme" was taken )

I think mine says it all hurtinginOmaha, when I started coming here I hert like hell and I live in Omaha, NE.

c00ker is an abreviation of the handle of a guy who reviewed the first 911 turbo. I have always lusted after one, so plagarized it & now use it as my call sign.<P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain <BR>and makes the sun come out again

In Greek mythology Sisyphus was a king of Corinth punished by the gods. He is variously said to have committed crimes on earth (killing his children to try to avoid an even-worse prophesy--Greek tragedy does not give you any credit for extenuating circumstances) or to have stolen secrets from the gods. <P>His sentence in Hades was to roll a rock to the top of a hill ... whence it would immediately roll back down, forcing him to start over. <P>Albert Camus wrote on the subject, and said that Sisyphus eventually found a kind of peace in performing his meaningless labor.<P>I, on the other hand, was in a marriage where time and time again progress would be made (economic, professional ,etc.); my XW would discount it, demand disruptive changes, express her hopelessness, scoff at financial analyses (or say she couldn't understand them--when her job required far *more* sophisticated financial acumen), and in general reward stagnation and punish success. All the time she was thwarting evolution, she was preparing revolution. And after she had it, it turned out to be largely not what she wanted. <P>I'm not saying I wasn't resentful of having her unemployed brother move into our house for a year, or that she bought a new convertible (saddling us with $650 monthly payments) when I was driving the oldest car (and neither incumbent car was problematic), or that she froze me out in the bedroom, or that her father enjoys her uncritical admiration even after well-documented misbehavior ended his professional career. It's OK for him to lie practically *compulsively* about things that matter, but if I even color the truth a little about something that doesn't...<P>I'm not saying I didn't mind hearing endless tales of Machiavellian office politics and how she, as a woman with no kids, was given more time-consuming and lower-paying projects than others. I'm not saying I liked that her condition meant *never* being able to get up early and go do something (unless her *work* demanded it), nor was outdoor recreation on the menu--either it hurt to do, or had an unacceptable likelihood of encounters with icky wildlife.<P>Nor am I saying I didn't underearn, get depressed, filter information she received about our finances (mainly so she wouldn't forego certain things and blame me for having to), or give $50 to the McCain campaign without telling her. <P>I'm not saying it didn't irk me that when I posted on boards such as this one and she found out she considered it a terrible betrayal even though all was anonymous and done so that neither of us could be identified (when I didn't begrudge her [or even comprehend as being problematic] an emotional affair of hers that happened early in our marriage); nor would she consider getting her own login ID and looking for others' opinions about what we were going through (I'm tempted to let her know I'm posting again after nearly a year, but it would likely only make both our lives worse).<P>I'm not even saying I didn't nurture a white-hot rage inside when we made a lot of progress at a four-day intensive version of a weekend Gottman seminar, and on our return she wouldn't participate in finding a local counselor to continue therapy; slipping back to believing it worthless. Could the psychiatrist I was seeing counsel us? No, he was poison--because he was "mine".<P>I'm not saying lots of other things don't still bug me (my very "stoicism" and willingness to endure being grounds for criticism), or that we didn't bear a strange resemblance to Niles and Maris (I've lost count of the number of one-liners that were bulls-eye hits). <P>All I'm saying is that I was willing to keep rolling that rock as long as the task remained at hand; and that I miss it.<BR><p>[This message has been edited by Sisyphus (edited December 27, 2000).]

JavaAllNightLong- Java is my teddy bear that I started sleeping with when I got sick of sleeping alone. Java stays with me all night long......

Wow, Sisyphys! I'm blown away by your answer. My name is fairly self explanatory. When I first came to MB, I was trying to work it out with my H (I thought--little did I know he was continuing his A behind my back). But, I'm proud to say I was a faithful wife, mind and body. I was married for ten years (together for twelve) when one day I watched a cute guy's [censored] as he walked by, and I realized it had been twelve years since I had even looked at another man. To this day, I haven't slept with another man since I met my stbx, although the temptation is overwhelming at times and there are certainly a couple I wouldn't mind attacking. But nonetheless, I have been, and will be faithful until the ink dries and my tears dry after that.<P>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

gsd,<P>Ragamuffin: (1581) name for a ragged oafish person, a ragged often disreputable person esp. a poorly clothed often dirty child.<P>This is the way I felt on the "inside" after discovery of the X-s years of cheating then being drug through the "attorney cleaners" by him for over 2-1/2 years.<P>Maybe I'll change it to Ragdoll (1853) a stuffed usu. painted cloth doll........<P>R.<BR>

Bellevue - the nuthouse. My H has told me I'm just plain crazy.<P>And I LOVE german shepherd dogs, above all other breeds, but like any dog or animal.<P>------------------<BR>Belle, Domestic Goddess

I lived on a street called Barrington during my single years. Hope to get to a place where I feel as good about myself as I did then. I think I basically regresses as a person during my marriage. Gave up my life to take care of ex, would not confront him or do things to get him mad because I was afraid he would leave. Joke is on me - I never did any of these things but he still left. <BR>Hope to know myself better when I finally reach closure on marriage. Everything I read says it takes at least two years for this to happen. In March it will be one year D-day anniversary. Hope to be concentrating totally on myself for the next year. 2001 has got to be better than 2000.

Sue- my nickname, short for Susan..I couldn't think of anything witty at the time I started posting....oh, well, in another life I may get creative and come up with "iwillsurvive"!!!<P>------------------<BR>Susan

Bernzini is the pet name that my husband gave our son. We all liked opera, my husband gave our son an "opera-sounding" pet-name.<P>He thoroughly razzed me for not only posting his secrets on this website (he doesn't lurk anymore, he says, because he can't deal with the "monsoon" of lies that I am giving you) but for blaspheming the name of his son. He says that I am trying to get you all to feel sorry for me.<P>Funny thing is, I don't feel sorry for myself at all. I feel pretty sorry for him, that's the whole moot point.<P>Anyways, my real name is Mary--I am an open book, and I don't care. I love my name and I feel so lucky that I've got it.

The X's response to my initiation of a discussion about my needs as a man.

my name was/is to express just how I felt/feel from the inside, out, right now.. <P>this horrible experience has really hit me hard, and (the shocked) feeling numb, like the walking dead, or another words, a zombie, was what I came up with, because this was/is how I felt/feel.. <P>It still fits.. my heart has never been the same.. and most likely will never be the same, (with any one else) again... <P>not that I won`t love again.. but that I may not love as deeply as I did the first time around again.. way too much distrust, right now..<P>AV

My name is a nickname that my mother gave to me when I was very young. kimberly kay of the milky way, instead of 'princess kay of the milky way' which is a beauty pageant for young girls. So I just shortened it a bit to kimkaymilkyway. Nothing spectacular about it, more sentimental than anything!

Mine is a strange one, and aborigine word that means making fires. I was very involved with ACDs (Australian Cattle Dogs) and therefore ended up looking into the cultures of OZ. Always figured I would name a red dog bangarra some day.<P>Lori

A friend gave me this name..said that I have<BR>been hurt so much that I'm like a beautiful rose nobody can get close to anymore because<BR>of all the thorns..<P>said I've just had to learn to protect myself..so that others can't hurt me and destroy me anymore..trying to pluck all the beauty out of my life..

I was in too much pain when I came here and didn't think of one LOL<P>Mine is My Christian given name and my middle initial...<P><BR>Bill

I graduated from the University of Kansas in 1993. The JAYHAWK is the mascot of KU.<P>I was also too upset when I first came to this site to come up with anything more original than this.<P>gsd....GREAT TOPIC!

WOW<BR>there are some really great names on here!<BR>I mean i never really thought of what they all mean. Now with stories behind them they mean so much more. I can honestly say i'll never look at the names without wondering.<P>Cool!<P>Mine just represents what i am trying to do.<BR>My ex tells me i live too much in the past.<BR>So now i try to "look ahead"<BR>I'm also a great pesimist and i'm trying to change that too.<P>

You know the story. <P>Cinderella was forced to be the servant for a lot of uncaring, unloving folks. She could do nothing to please. She got no positive rewards for all her efforts. She was treated as a non-person. She had no adult companionship in a house full of adults. <P>Well, my x could only value me in terms of how well I kept house. He could not see any of my redeeming qualities. He could not affirm me. He took away my self-esteem. <P>Then he left (after 2,3,4, how many (?) EAs.<P>Now I have a smile on my face and a song in my heart. (We're talking Leslie Ann Warren not Walt Disney version, here.) I have found much more beauty in myself than I had before the disintegration of my marriage.<P>Now, if only I could find Prince Charming. And if I don't, I will still be a princess.