Let's face it. There are precious few opportunities in my life, at present, for meeting other people.<P>Work and church are the same for me. That is, I work where I go to church. (And their idea of a singles group is one for recent college graduates.) Don't meet anyone at any of the three schools I am in and out of. Don't meet any at the grocery store. Don't find many, if any, at bookstores or the library and the libraries near my home are closed on Fridays. And I don't know that I'd believe a word a stranger - except for my friends here - said on the internet.<P>I would love some companions. A group into which I fit. I want some "running buddies" since I was sort of isolated during my marriage and really don't have a host of friends with whom to do things.<P>Would it seem reasonable for me to contact some churches in my area and of my faith - I am NOT interested in a new church home at present - and asked to be informed of their singles activities? <P>I'm busy but sort of lonely. Sad thought, a lonely princess.<P>

Cinderella,<BR>I am in the same boat as you. I have considered going to a bigger church that has very active singles groups, however as far as I have seen they only do stuff, officially that is, during the week. I really have no time during the week. Its the weekends when I don't have the kids thats the killer for me.<P>Bob

.<p>[This message has been edited by Trying to move on (edited March 26, 2001).]

Well, I cycle a lot, so as the weather gets warmer, I'm going to get more involved with the local cycling club. Ditto for running. I've considered matchmakers, but I'm not really interested in going there yet. I have a friend who has invited me to one of her parties next month where I won't know anybody. It's kind of frightening, but I'm looking at it as a sociology lab -for me!<P>My problem is going to be getting over my natural shyness and getting back out into the world.<P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain <BR>and makes the sun come out again

I am not looking to date, per se, but I am finding myself smiling a lot more at strangers, making eye contact, innocently flirting in elevators and at Home Depot. I strike up simple friendly conversations with any man who seems relatively attractive or sane or that he bathes regularly. Not to meet him--I'm not desperate--but to reassure myself that I can communicate with people of the opposite sex. It is even fun when they flirt back (even 40 year old men). I am using my humor and wit with others too and not being afraid of being judged. I am not exaggerating when I say I have been getting more looks and smiles (and even some obnoxious cat calls) over the past few months. I NEVER got one during my 3 year marriage, and I consider myself to be quite atrtractive. I thought I was invisible for those three years. <P>I am a high school teacher. And unless I want to date a 40ish woman, I am plum out of luck. Do you have a dog or a bird that sits on your shoulder? Use it to your advantage. It's a conversation piece. That's how my friend met his wife of six years. He was walking through PetSmart with a Boa around his neck. Sounds crazy I know. But it's a start. What about getting a second job?

Hey Cinderella,<P>I can relate to expanding the social circle. Well not anymore, but when this first happened, because my life was totally revolving around my husband. <P>I started by getting back to all my close girlfriends. Lucky for me they were there for me! I started going to all the events I had recently passed up.<P>I went to everything from baseball games, to a ballet to picnics, parties, whatever one of my friends invited me to , I went.<P>I do think church is a great way to meet people,plus I think they have different groups for "single", "divorced" and "couples", etc. <P>I would also say depending on your hobbies, you could take a cooking class at the local supermarket, a craft class at the local craft store, anything that gets you out with other women and you'll start meeting more people!<P>Right now, I have my life back and its full of all the important people and many new ones too that I will not let go of like I did before.<P>Also, the local home depot has classes for free each week on different home remodeling things, like laying tile, wallpapering, etc. This is a great place to meet the "opposite sex" that doesn't have to be for a date, just friendship.<P>Dana<BR>

I'd thought about classes at Home Depot. After all, secretly, I think a man should be at least as mechanically inclined as I am. One of the prerequisites would be handiness. <BR>And I don't mean the titillating kind.