First time post, been on site for 2 weeks, read and reread almost all sections, will share details later but must know from divorced:<BR>quick details<BR>9ys marriage, 5yo son, <BR>wife began EA/PA in mid-sept, 2 wks later wants D, moves out thanksgiving day, sign D paper next week.<P>Wife has "turned" back on marriage/relationship and began new relationship. Wants out of marriage now. spends weekend away while I keep son, keeps him some during week.<P>Question:<BR>Will, does, has WW some back and ask for forgiveness and recon?<BR>How long does the "fog" usually last?<BR>Are these affairs really worth giving up a marriage/home over?<P>A Broken Man

Hi ABM,<P>I'm still kind of an amateur at this, but I wanted to reply and give you my traditional welcome to the D/D forum. I'm sorry you're here.<P>As to your questions, to the first, sometimes, of course, but I don't know of any statistics. To the second, Harley estimates 1-2 yers iirc, and to the third, I don't think so, but my STBX is doing it right now.<P>I think plan A is in order, but since mine didn't work, I hope someone more experienced will check in and expound on the plan.<P>Take care...<P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain <BR>and makes the sun come out again

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by A Broken Man:<BR><B>Will, does, has WW some back and ask for forgiveness and recon?</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Of course this happens. Often in novels, much less often in real life. What you may get is a much more subtle, tentative and fragile attempt to reconnect. Without the apologies and expressions of regret you <B><I>expect</B></I>.<P><B> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR><BR>How long does the "fog" usually last?</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Something can rip it away tomorrow. Or it may persist forever. You've probably got a fair amount of it too, and will continue to have it; unless and until you are able to take a hard look at your part in all of this. That doesn't mean beating yourself up. It means clarity about what you did or didn't do, and how it contributed to the breakup regardless of how it was intended (indeed, regardless of whether it was a good and right thing to do--not every good deed goes unpunished, and if you did a good job of filling the wrong role [even if it was the right role <B><I>at the time</B></I>], you're still just as scr*ewed). <P><B> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Are these affairs really worth giving up a marriage/home over?</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Not usually. But that's the nature of "the fog".