I will be moving out in two weeks. My STBX doesn't show emotion (except anger, that he's good at!) So I'm left to fill in the blanks as to how he is feeling. When I say something regarding the move, because he is de-void of emotion, I will put words in his mouth, like; I'll be out of your life soon, oh how happy you'll be! I know it's sarcastic, but it is almost like I have to put up this wall of some sort. We've been together for 13yrs. and I am emotional and my heart is broken. He told me this weekend that he is so sorry for the mistakes he has made. What do you all think, will he miss me and really realize how good he had it with me???????? I would have gone to the ends of the earth for him. To death do us part ( I thought anyway )

R,<P>I am where you are at and I have said the same things - my H is completely non-emotional...I wonder the same things you do, but don't dwell on it - when I find myself wondering how he will be when I'm not there - I try and turn my thoughts around to how happy I hope he will be in his life and I hope he will find someone more suited - I don't wish him loneliness, unless he truly wants to be alone - I don't think he does. He still calls me to share the little events of the day - I have been the only one that cares for so long - I still care, but he will have to let that go soon - it may be hard - or not - who knows. <P>I hold no hope for reconsiliation, sometimes I think he does, but he knows me and deep down he knows that most likely won't happen. <BR>Right now we are just trying very hard to stay friends through all of this - we have been each others best friend for almost 20 years -

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by REJECTED:<BR><B>I will be moving out in two weeks. My STBX doesn't show emotion (except anger, that he's good at!) So I'm left to fill in the blanks as to how he is feeling. When I say something regarding the move, because he is de-void of emotion, I will put words in his mouth, like; I'll be out of your life soon, oh how happy you'll be! I know it's sarcastic, but it is almost like I have to put up this wall of some sort. We've been together for 13yrs. and I am emotional and my heart is broken. He told me this weekend that he is so sorry for the mistakes he has made. What do you all think, will he miss me and really realize how good he had it with me???????? I would have gone to the ends of the earth for him. To death do us part ( I thought anyway )</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P><P>------------------<BR>poodlepapa

rejected,<BR>maybe what she means is that only by totally ending the "old" can she begin the new. for some, the spectre of carrying that old baggage around makes taking action impossable...she may be polarized and unable to do or act any other way. <P>isn't it possible that she wants the same things as you but feels that getting them requires the she must travele a different road? <P>you feel the responsible and adult way of doing it is to stick it out and fight through together. she may feel that for her, the right path to take is to put an end to what she feels has been a negative experience in her life and begin all over again.<P>both of you might want to end up in the same place. what a shame it would be if disagreing about the method of getting their, prevents it from happening.

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by REJECTED:<BR><B>I will be moving out in two weeks. My STBX doesn't show emotion (except anger, that he's good at!) So I'm left to fill in the blanks as to how he is feeling. When I say something regarding the move, because he is de-void of emotion, I will put words in his mouth, like; I'll be out of your life soon, oh how happy you'll be! I know it's sarcastic, but it is almost like I have to put up this wall of some sort. We've been together for 13yrs. and I am emotional and my heart is broken. He told me this weekend that he is so sorry for the mistakes he has made. What do you all think, will he miss me and really realize how good he had it with me???????? I would have gone to the ends of the earth for him. To death do us part ( I thought anyway )</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P><BR>He is feeling plenty of emotions. They are all so knotted up inside they don't get out. What you see is a numb automaton. When you say the things you say, it hurts more than you can imagine. I know. I was there (but no affair). STBXW's want to see *something* when they've made up their mind to leave their men. But the men don't know what; and honestly, I think anything we do show gets misinterpreted, or filtered through a cynical lens, or is just plain inappropriate anyway. It is not a healthy time. So we show nothing at all during those times when we can keep our composure.<P>You will *not* be making him happy by leaving. The unfortunate part is; by the time you have made your point to him, it is too late in your own mind to reclaim the marriage. That's the irony of marital breakdown. <BR>