Yes...a pity party post...<P>I am haveing one of those major down weeks...<P>My insides have been churning...<P>I find myself paying a tab or two as a result of my D...<P>I'm haveing to sell my way to big of house...wondering if I can do it before I get bankrupted...Wishing I could get off my [censored] and do what I need to!<P>I haven't hit a lull like this in sometime and I don't like it!! I have been spending waaay too much time in my head and the frikken committe up there won't quit!!<P>I know deep down everything will work out...I knew this tab would come to pass...I just don't want it to!!<P>Plus I think I'm comming down with something...or it just might be this huge-[censored] weight on my shoulders!!<P>At any rate..I still need to take care of it...I also need to put the finishing touches on my all ready agreed to property settlement and I have been dragging my feet on that...<P>Anyhoo...Thanks for letting my whine...and no I don't need any cheese to go with it <P>Love you guys,<P>Bill

We all have one of those down week, weeks, day, days ect...<P>I just got through paying my lawyer fees. It cost me $3,600 to get divorced. I got a small settlement from my XH, but after paying lawyer bill, a late house payment of $1000, car repair on my van and son's car......I can go on...I have almost gone through it.<P>I just have to remember I am a lot better off that many women with children that get divorced.<P>I try to think of the positives...I still have a house, my kids, a great job, plenty of money to buy groceries and sometimes crab legs with hot butter...yum....<P>I hope you feel better! You will the things done you need too...I would put things off because I could not deal with it at the time or it meant getting closer to closure and the big D.<P>Hang in there!

Bill I hate those down times. I have at least one every week. Things are still raw for me.<P>Take a big warm hug from me in New Zealand we are thinking of you<P>(((((((((((((((Bill))))))))))))))))))

Monsieur Guillaum mon cher--<P>It WILL be alright!! You know that! Have faith!<P>I have three kinds of cheese for your whine sittin in my fridge right now!!--oh, wait a sec. . . Do you mind blue fuzz on your cheese? Teethmarks?<P>You know how much we all love you!!<p>[This message has been edited by Bernzini (edited January 17, 2001).]

Hey Bill,<P>I know where you're coming from. January is has been a killer for my budget. I hope I can catch up by March <P>It's really hard to have to endure the pain and the financial difficulties, just so someone else can pursue their "dreams". It's very selfish and destructive of them and sometimes I feel like they either don't know, or just don't care.<P>Try to keep it all in perspective and only worry about the alligator that is closest to your boat. (hope none have gotten in yet) Keep fighting them off and you'll make it back to shore.<P>There is nothing wrong with feeling this way. It's perfectly natural. Just try to relax, make sure you get enough rest and eat right and stay active. It will all pass eventually (easy for me to say, I know). Patience and time my friend.<P>Take care...<P><P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain <BR>and makes the sun come out again

Bill, <P>Yep, it is ok to vent here, thats what we are here for!! We all have those days, I am sure..some more, some less. But make sure to take good care of yourself, eat well, try to slepp good...it will all work out!!<P>------------------<BR>Susan

Bill,<P>Hang in there buddy, things will turn around.<P>Have faith (I know it is tough some times)!<P>God Bless!<P>Mike<P>------------------<BR>God always waits for the right time to do the right thing in the right way.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>I'm so sorry you are feeling bummed. This just is so unfair, isn't it? It hurts like hell, and you lose everything and everyone, and it seems like you'll never quite recover. <P>I'm not a great one to be advising you, but I know you will eventually feel better. Eventually you'll take a big breath, do what you NEED to do to survive, and get on with it. <P>Personally, I say feel sad for a while. Wallow around in it and get to know it a little, because this is darn hard and sad! But after wallowing for a while, come back out and feel a little better for accepting your sorrow and embracing it. <P>I know how you feel about having to do what you know you NEED to do. I don't want to copy all the taxes and take photos of the house and make a witness list and sell our house...I don't want to do ANY of it. But I have to--and you do too. <P>So have a nice wallow, and we'll all jump in the pit with you so you don't drown in it. You know, we all love ya, Bill. <P>{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P><BR>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Bill,<P>Hey there buddy! <P>Your not the only one.We all have down days.<P>I do believe that if it doesn't kill us it will only make us stronger!!<P>We are all here for ya!<P>Just hang in there..........you will be fine.<P>Gina <P>------------------<BR>"If we deny love that is given to us,if we refuse to give love because we fear pain or loss,then our lives will be empty,our loss greater!"-----Anonymous----

WJ,<P>Can I join your pity party? There's not enough room in my house for the one I'm holding today.<P>Had one of "those" conversations with stbx last night...it hit me once again how "in the fog" he is and how hard he has worked to justify his actions.<P>He actually said he didn't believe his divorce would leave any lasting scars on our children and that they wouldn't have a problem getting to know his OW - unless I made it a problem. He's got it all set up so that when my kids have a very normal, natural reaction to their dad being with someone who is not their mom, it will now conveniently be "all my fault" for having "primed" them to dislike her. Like I'm going to make any effort on her behalf to begin with, duh! I told him the best gift I could give him is to ignore the fact that she exists on the same planet as me...anything more than that is asking way too much.<P>He is SOOOOOO not the man I thought he was. His children no longer are his first concern. He makes me so angry, bitter, depressed and sad and then I hate myself for still having feelings for someone who could do that to me. One big doormat! Arrrggghhh!.<P>So, pity party away my friend...I'll bring the chips and salsa!<P>Lisa

Now this is a post I can jump in on too. First you try to deal with all the emotional stress and then the financial hits you. I'm just now at the tip of the financial iceberg and I'm scared to death. Why is it usually the one that is not the WS that gets hosed? <P>Expect more from me like yours my friend. Keep up the faith.<P>Good Luck and God Bless<P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Bill}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P>Don't crawl under a rock... it's too cold down there. What you need is us...... and lots of hugs.<P>Right after the D, I was extreamly worried about my financial situation... didn't know if I'd make it, but I pulled through, and you will too. <P>Look at moving to a smaller house as a good thing.... I know it's hard to move on, but think about making a new home for you and Abbey, and have her help you... I know she's very young, but this can be a fun adventure for her too, and there is nothing like a child to bring your spirits up!<P>Ok, so try this... picture me in my flannel pj's and fuzzy slippers freezing my hiney off.... icecicles haning from my nose and ears.... burried butt deap in snow! And then remember you are running around in a t-shirt... that should make you feel at least a little better.<P>If that doesn't work.... think about the phone call. <P>We love ya, Man! <BR>B

Bill,<P>Don't worry, you just slipped down the slippery slope a little. Just pick yourself up and start climbing back up as you are coming close to the top !!!<P>Hang in, and God Bless,<P>Bob

Hey Bill,<P>the only rock I have is quite large, we call it Ayers Rock!!!!!!!!!!<P>You don't need that tho do you??????<P>I think the fuzzy cheese with teethmarks sounds perfect with your whine!!!!<P>You're doing fine, you know you are. Of course you're going to have days like this, after all, we're the ones who are feeling this. Living this, and getting through this. They're not.<P>I agree with whoever said it, let yourself have sad days, be down, but then get back up again.<BR>There's a song here that has the main chorus as<P>"I get knocked down, but I get up again, <BR>you're never gonna keep me down<BR>I get knocked down, but I get up again<BR>you're never gonna keep me down"<P>It was used as the tv jingle for league football here. It's great. I heard it last night on the radio on my way home from work and every time I hear it, I think to myself I have to buy that cd. I'm going to go and buy the single today. I'm going to get one for you too.<BR>Email me with your address.<BR>It's a bit of a 'guy' song - obviously, if they used it for footy, I think you'll like it. and the louder you play it, the better it is!!!!!!<P>big hugs to you my friend, love you heaps<P>Jo

Bill- Sorry you are having a bad week. I just came out of that slump this last weekend. financially I know where u are coming from. Right now my checkbook is in the red until friday. I have a drawer full of bills I can't pay and I have three kids to try to support. I'm waiting paitently for my tax refund, knowing that is coming has kind of brought me out of this funk. You just need to say to yourself," I'm not going to worry about the things I have no control over." <BR>I hope tomorrow is a better day for you.<P>hugs,<P>Jill<P>------------------<BR>live for today for there may not be a tomorrow

Well my pity part is over...I managed to put things in priority. I can't fix everything at once so it's one task at a time <P>Thanks all for the kind words...<P>M3K: You have the right idea too!!<P>rjs: Thanks for the KIWI hug...It will expand to every other week then once a month then every other month...I just try not to stay in it..<P>Madame Bernzi: Bon joir Mon Amie!! I'll pass on the fuzzy ABC cheese...Thanks though!! <P>Nick: You are quite right..It does pass, but I need to get off my [censored] and do the footwork!! Thanks <P>Sue: I eat pretty well but I need to work on the sleep, and maybe the exorcise too.<P>CJ: I have made it a point to walk through the feelings and just feel them..This is a gift that I am grateful for...They told me when I got clean is the good news is you get your feelings back and the bad news is..you get your feelings back!! LOL<P>Gina: Thanks old friend!! <P>S2BA: Isn't just amazing the conveluted ideas they have!! Hang in there sister!! <P>Paul: Your ride has just begun...keep comming back and dump away!!<P>BF: Yes another t-shirt day! <P>Bob: Can you help me find my bootstraps! LOL Thanks old buddy!! <P>Jo: Thanks for the song lyrics...that is the truth!!<P>Jill: Can you help me find the rubber fragments of my check book? It just exploded!!<P>Thanks all for the warmth and love...It truly helps!!<P>Bill<P><BR>

{{{{{{Bill}}}}}<P>We all have bad days, Sorry my post is a little late, but glad that you are feeling at least a little better.<P>Hang in there and take it one day and one problem at a time!! You'll get there. <P>I know about the bankruptcy issue and too many things coming in January. Your not alone!! <P>Hugs,Dana<BR>

{{{Bill}}}<P>Hugs to you in your down time! It is a shocker, but I think we all get through and keep on putting one foot in front of the other.<P>Rocks aren't a good place for cover... cold and dirty and heavy. Try a nice feather comforter, it's warm, light and feels wonderful.<P>Lori <BR>