Hey guys, the few of you that responded, i really appreciate your honest opinions. I have no friends to trust but you guys. Sysyphus thank you for your advice. I guys I am happy that my hubby is still with me, but it hurts so much the way he ignores me. The way he shows no feelings for me at all. He doesnt ever touch me unless i do and that has changed since about a year ago, I know that my pregnancy changed my attitude and i got so jeolous when i found that topless bar card last year that I have been driving him nuts and making him pay. Now i realized what my jeaulousy has caused and i would do anything to get him to love me again. I try to plan A but i must admit its really hard if i dont get the results i want. I plan A him to death for a couple of days and I get maybe a smile from him, but nothing else. what should i do, how long do i plan A before i give up. please help. thanks to all of you that have responded. take care guys. please write soon.

I don't really know your story so I'm not quite sure what to say. It sounds like you are still trying hard to work things out. I pray that Plan A can help you. I know that it has worked for quite a few people but I also know that it is extremely hard to do.<P>Hang in there. I hope it works out for you soon.

I dont really know your story either. All I know is plan A is very hard and it does hurt. It is also about you too, the focus shouldnt all be on H.<P>Take care and keep posting

<A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A> is simply about not comitting <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3400_lovebust.html" TARGET=_blank>Love Busters</A>.<P>If you can meet some <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi3300_needs.html" TARGET=_blank>Emotional Needs</A> then that is bonus!<P>You want to create trust and a safe emotional enviroment.<P>Stick to your Plan A<P>Bill

aamymail,<P>If the problems you are having in your relationship took time to develop, don't think that any answer is going to solve them overnight. There are no "cure-all" pills or magical elixers to use. If you want things to change, then dedicate yourself to making the changes with you first. It might takes weeks/months/years before you get to where you want to be. Don't be in such a rush.<P>Also if you are doing nice things for him, don't be so rushed to expect a positive reaction. Do the things because you want to, not because you want something from him in return (in the short run). Try loving unconditionally for a few weeks.<P>Sure it may not be fair, but then again when is love ever fair?? If you want to remain married for the rest of your life then take a longterm outlook right now. Keep telling yourself that what you are doing now is going to have benefits down the road.<P>By taking the focus off the short-term, you may alleviate some pressure in your household and before you know it, you may see changes happening in him as well.<P>God Bless,<BR>Mike<P>------------------<BR>God always waits for the right time to do the right thing in the right way.