It's truly amazing the way the Lord works sometimes. I was at work Sunday afternoon burning a CD (don't have a burner at home) when my W calls and asks me if I'm going to church or not. I told her I probably was so she asked if she could come by work and we could ride together, I said OK. Now understand, I usually don't get to go on Sunday evenings because the kids go to bed early for school.<P>My pastor stands up after the singing part of the service and begins his sermon. He starts by saying it's a subject he's been meaning to preach for some time and it's completely "Bible". (Meaning it is serious) The subject? Marriage. He laid into the way people treat others in marriages, what is right what is wrong. He spoke of the meaning and strength of marriage, and of the only acceptable reasons for divorce. He explained the difference between being joined by God and being joined by "just anyone". He pretty much laid it on the line, no holds barred, toe stepping and all. Needless to say during and after the service I had to check to see if mine or my W's toes were still there, they had been stepped on so many times. <P>My W sat and listened intently. After service she asked if I had spoke with the pastor. I told her no, I hadn't yet. I know he wasn't speaking to us directly, but all practical purposes he was. I told my W that she looked allot better fixed up and not so "tired". She kind of smiled and said she was trying something. After service as she had a tear in her eye and asked for a hug, I obliged of course. AS we drove back to get my car all she played on the radio was a tape I had made of our church choir. Let me tell you, she sounded like an angel.<P>I'm still guarded and distrusting, but I have hope. The resentment is slowly fading. We're supposed to sit down and talk tonight to see if we are going to be able to do what it would take for this to even be a possibility. God works in strange ways. I'm still at a loss as to what to do. Pray for me my friends, that I'll do God's will. <P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.

The challenge is going to be in finding a way to capitalize on what happened Sunday. This is no time to take it on yourselves to try to fix the problems. Get a third party involved, preferably a very skilled third party who has no preexisting allegiance to either of you. <P>God made sure you both got the important message on Sunday, but even he does not expect that it will be near enough. He expects the two of you to do what you need to do.

Hi Paul,<P>that's great news. Even the fact that she rang and suggested you go together. Wonderful.<P>Take it slow, and be patient. (Boy, that's the second time I've told someone else to be patient in the last 10 minutes, now, if only I could be!!!!!!!!!!!)<P>I will keep you in my prayers.<P>You're right, God does work in strange ways. I lost *Him* for a while there, but I'm pleased to say that nightly prayers are back on the agenda. You will be in mine.<P>take care, and big hugs for you<P>Jo

It is true about Him working in un real ways!!<P>Keep the faith!!<P>Bill

Paul,<P>The most amazing thing about Sunday was how unexpected it was - that is how I know it was a gift from God to the both of you. God knows that He can not change a person's mind - He gave us our "free-will" to do with as we see fit. But He can and will show us the direction He wants us to go. It sounds like He gave you both a very powerful sign on Sunday.<P>Keep remembering and telling yourself that you can not change your wife's mind or feelings - all you can do is focus on your own. Walk in God's light and trust in His love. If you can honestly do that, I believe your wife will see it in you. Then maybe her feelings/thoughts will begin to change.<P>Take things slow - shift your focus to your love for your wife. Don't let her actions or words sway you from your feelings. I think the devil revels in miscommunication between men and women. Don't let him have his way with the two of you.<P>Be strong. I'll pray for you both!<P>God Bless,<BR>Mike<P>------------------<BR>God always waits for the right time to do the right thing in the right way.

God does work miraculous ways. Perhaps, hopefully, a turning point was placed before you. But good intentions are nothing if there are no followup actions. I pray that the points made will be taken to heart by both of you and that this will lead you to a new beginning.

Thanks for the replies everyone, I have been in training classes the past few days and I'm just now catching up. I will continue to seek God's will, even though 'm already running into obstacles. <P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.

Paul:<P>I hope things are better today. Someone here said 1 step forward and 1,000,000 back, and so it goes.<P>I feel like I get messages from God too and then thngs fall backward again. I don't understand His ways... we're not meant to are we? I have magical thoughts that somehow we could both resolve to be better people for ourselves and to each other but it never happens. Why?<P>You seem pretty learned up on your Bible. Where is it that it talks about not being able or expected to deal with one who is contentious?<P>I will add your wishes to my prayers. Praying is about all we can do in some cases.<P> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Paul Moyers:<BR><B>Thanks for the replies everyone, I have been in training classes the past few days and I'm just now catching up. I will continue to seek God's will, even though 'm already running into obstacles. <P></B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>

Proverb:21:19: It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.<P>Proverb:27:15: A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike.<P>Kind of funny if you look at it literally. <P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.

There's something about how it's better to live in the corner of a housetop than with a b*tch, too; as well as one that a morsel of crumbs alone is better than a feast shared with one.<P>I think Harley is right though--if you give them <I>your</I> all, they don't give you h*ll. It's men's typical lack of communication skills and lack of commitment to communication that turns wives that way. If there's good communication, things that can be fixed get fixed, and things that can't be fixed get empathy.<p>[This message has been edited by Sisyphus (edited January 29, 2001).]

Proverb:21:9: It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.<P>I agree with you and Harley about the communication. I agree with you as well in that sometimes we men are somewhat "duh". As far as causing one person to act a particular way, I've always heard and believe that no-one can make you feel or do anything. They may do something and in turn you choose to react in a particular fashion, the point being you choose. A long topic of debate I believe.<P>------------------<BR>1Co:2:4: And my speech and my preaching was not with enticing words of man's wisdom, but in demonstration of the Spirit and of power:<BR>1Co:2:5: That your faith should not stand in the wisdom of men, but in the power of God.