Hi Guys, just need a little virtual TLC. My exH is marrying his OW tomorrow. We have been divorced a little over a month. My former BIL just picked up my 11 yo and they are flying up to the wedding. My D is in the wedding. Even though this is OW's 2nd marriage and my exH's 3rd marriage they are having a full blown wedding with bridesmaids, tuxedoes and I am sure the bride will be in white. I just boo hoo hooed after they left. Apparently the OW is a very upbeat person and my exH is very happy around her. <P>I have been driving myself crazy trying to find an answer to why he did this - why he started the affair, why he lied to me so much (even lied about her identity for 6 months) why he did not even want to try to work it out with me after being together 13 years (married 12). I guess there is no one answer - a bunch of reasons.<P>All I know is that I have to somehow move on and let go of him and my feelings for him and just concentrate on myself and my daughter.<P>Boy this weekend is going to be a tough one.<P>Thanks,<BR>Pat

Yes, Pat. I can understand your feelings. Although my ex hasn't yet remarried, it's very likely.<P>I think we will always wonder why certain things happen. It's true that we may never know the full story. However, as I may know part of it, it helps a lot. Right now it hurts like hell. But I think after tomorrow, when I don't have to see him anymore.<P>Yes, do take care of yourself as good as you can. I know it will be hard.<P>Martha

{{{{{{{{{{Pat}}}}}}}},<P>I feel for you...<BR>...I too will be heading down that road...<P>My divorce will be on March 19...<BR>...and I feel... my exW will very shortly thereafter marry the OM...<P>...to make it "legit"... <P>But how do you make "legit"...<BR>...doing <I>this</I> to the kids!<P>---------------------------------------<P>You and I and those in our shoes...<BR>...have to move ahead!<P> <P>Jim

Hi Pat,<BR>Boy do I know how you are feeling. My X is marrying his OW on Friday. My kids will be there also. This will also be his third marriage and her second. We were married for 17 years and and he has known her for what, 7 months. I really do hope he is happy with his choice. I know that what has happened is for the best even though I have been going through a down period about it. <P>Just know that I'll be thinking about you tomorrow and I hope you find something really fun to do instead of dwelling on his wedding. You can also bask in the knowledge that his marriage to her probably doesn't stand a chance in hell of working out. So take it easy and write me if you need to talk. My e-mail is jillie_bean_36@hotmail.com<P>JIll<P>------------------<BR>live for today for there may not be a tomorrow

Hi Barrington,<P>just thinking of you. Wanted you to know that.<P>keep your chin up, and try to do something for you. A movie with a girlfriend, a facial, a good funny book, but something for YOU.<P>You deserve it. They deserve each other. But no matter how many times we say that, it still doesn't ring true does it. They shouldn't be with these op.<P>take care of you, and I'm thinking of you<P>Jo

.<p>[This message has been edited by Trying to move on (edited March 26, 2001).]