Hello, I'm new and no sure where to start. My H left about 6 months ago. For the 1s 4 months we did a lot together (even overnight trips) with our 3 yr old son. My H met someone much older 2 months ago. Now she gives him all of the emotional support he needs. When my H left, I knew we had problems, but I didn't understand it until he was gone. He has already filed for divorce and wants it to be over asap, so that he can go on. (I think he's hiding from the pain).<P>I do not want to give up on us - I want to fix my problems (there are quite a few) for H and for me too. However I can't seem to let go of my hope that he will turn around. I try not to focus on it, but I do want to put more positives into his love account. How can I do that when he is in witdrawal? Conflict only pushes us farther apart. Should I just accept that it is too late - I haven't been able to accept it so far? Thanks.

Welcome <B>Regretful 1</B>...<P>There is a post of general welcome I wish to share with you... <P>It has a lot of quick links to many of the <B>most</B> important MB sites...<BR>Click here ==> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000553.html" TARGET=_blank>General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)</A><P><B>About your post</B>...<P>Do start on a <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A>...<BR>Check out my post <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum30/HTML/000176.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A - 101 (2nd ed.)</A>.<P>"I want to fix my problems"...<BR>...that is what Plan A gives you a chance to do...<BR>...start on it!<P>"I try not to focus on it(hope that he will turn around)"...<BR>...that is what Plan A gives you a chance to do...<BR>...start on it!<P>"How can I do that when he is in witdrawal"...<BR>...put the focus on you!<BR>...and don't wait for immediate results...<BR>...(you're not going to <B>see</B> them!<P>Don't accept that it's too late...<P>In the book <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi6070_sa.html" TARGET=_blank> "Surviving An Affair"(SAA)</A>... there is the quote... <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>(#3.) The (betrayed) spouse needs to know that he/she had done his/her best to save their marriage. (page 76 of SAA)<HR></BLOCKQUOTE>...give it some time!<P> <P><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000254.html" TARGET=_blank>Jim</A> / <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000037.html" TARGET=_blank>NSR</A>