Hope everyone had a nice Valentine's Day and a good holiday weekend! I've been gone for quite a while, stbx's accident, work and then off for 5 days in the desert. <P>As far as the accident... I found out the only reason neighbor got me involved was because I had flexible schedule and could go and pick H up. Once again, doormat me, fell for it. I had a blast camping, we had 5 familes there and it was great to see fathers acting like fathers, made me realize that H has never been a father, much less a husband. (OK, know some of you are saying, DUH about this time )<P>I drove home in the rain, and H was parked across the street at the neighbor's, as I pulled into the drive he came out and stood there, talked to our daughter briefly. I looked over at him and realized that he wasn't worth my time, he had never been there for us as a family, so why did I spend 6 months trying to work on this. (Yes, I am better in myself, and the girls and I are becoming a true family now, but he's done nothing towards that at all) <P>I do have to admit that I love busted a LOT as I *FINALLY* got angry, I *FINALLY* realized that the girls and I are *BETTER OFF WITHOUT* him in our life. When I walked in the house and said I was done with trying, both girls said it was about time! I found out he broke into the house while I was gone, to get out the condiments from his race trip. <P>This doormat has finally figured that he isn't worth the dirt he left as he walked all over me. The kids and I deserve a real man, and he will never be that.<P>I'm a little shaky, but I'm not scared of him or his threats of what he will do to me in court, anymore. My love bank is depleated, it is gone, gone, gone... I am upset I wasted another week worrying about him while he was in the hospital. <P>Lori<P>

WAY TO GO GIRLFRIEND!!!!<P>

Broke in for condiments huh? How important can ketchup be??<P>I'm glad to hear you are doing well. It has been a long time since I have seen something from you. You don't have to be a doormat to be a good person to him and for your kids. Good for you!

a liitle update...<P>H wanted to meet me to tell me something, I asked what it was, he said had to meet with him to find out, so I did. he asked how teh weekend went and then said he knew my BF went, too. I said I didn't have a BF, so he says guy I have been to dinner with. I said, yes he went, and was asked wehere he slept. I said in the motorhome on the bed that folds down from dinette, older D and her friend were on couch bed and I slept with younger D. <BR>H went off on me about how what I was doing was setting things up for when our older D (age 13) becomes sexually active in a few years and he was concerned. I said why? there was no physical contact at all, and the guy spent more time with the girls that weekend than H has in years. He was a good male role model as far as I was concerned.<P>My kids like this guy, our friends like this guy, he is really a nice guy but I am not romantically involved in any way... we have gone to dinner and a movie a few times is all.<P>I went in to see my attorney Friday and filed a new petition, H will be served Wed. I'm so tired of his games, I tried for 6 months to make something work when he had made his mind up years ago. Have no idea how things will turn out, but the girls and I are going to be all right.<P>Lori

Lori,<P>Good for you..only thing that concerns me here is that your not divorced and he can try<BR>and use the OM as ammo against you in court..which is why it's a good reason not to<BR>date even after you've seperated..until that ink is dry..it does mean putting your life on a hold..which really sucks..but it's something I am learning from experience..and they can try and control how long the divorce process takes..so that you can't move on..