delete<p>[This message has been edited by Trying to move on (edited March 07, 2001).]

Slow down Trying,<P>I can feel an explosion coming. And being one who has exploded a couple of times, well...... it's not good.....<P>Good for you for getting it all off your chest. You needed to do that. Now come here when you feel it coming on again.<P>GOD I WISH I COULD DO THIS.................<P>How come I'm so good at dishing out this to everyone else.....LOL<P>When you said you put his clothes down the drain, what sort of drain? Won't that block everything up? You must have mighty big drains over there!!!!!!!!<P>take care, and keep on venting, it's good for you<P>Jo<BR>

delete<p>[This message has been edited by Trying to move on (edited March 07, 2001).]

delete<p>[This message has been edited by Trying to move on (edited March 07, 2001).]

We all have our anger to deal with. Back in December I was so close to lobbing two giant monkeywrenches into XW's life that it wasn't even funny. I'm glad I didn't, even though it would have been easy (a postage stamp and an e-mail), and a pair of stunning coups that would have cut both remaining cables supporting her life as she knows it. <P>What stopped me was the realization that my own life was neither blameless nor without vulnerabilities, and even if I could do what I planned without eartlhy repurcussions, there must be a ledger book somewhere. Finally, XW has said things in the past that put me on notice that if things got tough enough on her, I might wind up with <I>the ultimate in irreversibility</I> on my conscience.<P>In the end, she and I simply didn't make it. And she had to be the one to cut the ties. And I need to allow her the dignity and autonomy to make that decision for our lives. And then pick up the pieces of my own and move forward.

Sisyphus,<P>You said:<BR>"What stopped me was the realization that my own life was neither blameless nor without vulnerabilities, and even if I could do what I planned without eartlhy repurcussions, there must be a ledger book somewhere." <P>...and that is what I like about you!! <P>"Out of timber as crooked as that which man is made of, nothing perfectly straight can be carved" ---Immanuel Kant

Venting is good-at times, showing your spouse or X that you are upset over the situation and hurt this lets them know that you have feelings also. Back in January I took and busted a bunch of things in front of H to show my rage-48 hrs later I was sorry for my actions, all I really did was give H and OW something to talk about and I broke things that meant alot to me. Now I let my lawyer, his lawyer, friends and family do the digs. That way it doesn't reflect directly back on me.