my H had an affair with someone from work, I read an email, and he denied everything until I told him to look at the emails, he only told me what was already in the emails. I just want out of this marriage. We have 3 young children and I am expecting a 4th. I don't have any other family so how can I leave, how am I going to support myself and my children. My daughter is in kindergarten and my other 2 are only 1 and 3. Any advice will be greatly appreciated. He doesnot want me to leave, he said he made a mistake. I cannot live with someone that I do not trust.

Consider calling the Harleys (Counsel button above). <P>Alternatively, you can find a local marriage counselor. If he doesn't want you to leave, he should be willing to agree to go. <P>Let your concern for your children be your guiding light. What has happened is a tragedy, but it need not shatter the world that they grow up in; and your world may be reparable as well. You and he should do all you can to repair it.

Welcome <B>k8</B>...<P>There is a post of general welcome I wish to share with you... <P>It has a lot of quick links to many of the <B>most</B> important MB sites...<BR>Click here ==> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000553.html" TARGET=_blank>General Welcome for All New Builders(Newbies)</A><P><B>About your post</B>...<P>I agree with <B>Sisyphus</B> on this...<BR>...give it all you can... before you give up completely!<P>Do start on a <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi8113_ab.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A</A>...<BR>Check out my post <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum30/HTML/000176.html" TARGET=_blank>Plan A - 101 (2nd ed.)</A>.<P> <P><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000254.html" TARGET=_blank>Jim</A> / <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000037.html" TARGET=_blank>NSR</A>

You know, I cannot blame you for wanting a divorce. However, do not do anything in haste. I will tell you that many affairs happen not because the wayward spouse is inherently a bad person, but bcs he or she was lonely or did not feel fulfilled in the marriage, and then met someone & got in ouver their head without meaning to.<P>Yes, it is a terrible, terrible thing to do. But, often it is something that can be overcome, and that can lead to both partners reassessing what they really need and want from the marriage...it can lead to a marriage that is in some ways stronger than ever.<P>So, I'd suggest that you NOT react right away, esp. if your H is sorry and wants to work on the marriage. Give yourself and him a little time. Do look into counseling with the Harleys. Check out a couple of threads in the Recovery section....HGBrawner has a good thread here:<BR> <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000647.html" TARGET=_blank>www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum29/HTML/000647.html</A> <P>Do not act in haste...you have no idea how often I see a post from someone who demanded a divorce as soon as they found out, and later regrets it...<P>Hugs--<P>Kathi<p>[This message has been edited by kam6318 (edited March 06, 2001).]