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Cinderella,<P>These people are so pathetic and sad. I don't even know what to say. I feel so sorry for your son and the impact this will have on him. Stay strong for him. Wish you did not have to go through this.<P>Although I'm only in the process of getting a D I dread having to deal with this kinds crap in the future. Wish STBXH and OW would just vanish and leave kids and I alone!!

So the evil dragon has reared his head again and upset our beloved princess so.... <P>I am truly sorry that he is doing this. With this school, is there by chance any way for a scholarship or tuition break somehow? I know that a varity of the private schools here have things like that, especially the ones that handle your son's needs. Do you have anything in writing from doofus stating that he was going to be taking care of half of the tuition (just thinking that could have some sort of legal binding keeping your x legally bound to his share)?<P>I wish that I could give more encouraging words of support, but on the road of life where ex's go.... I am not sure of what to say that would be encouraging or helpful. I do know that something will work out. I would always suggest that if nothing else... use the money that you spend on tuition and hire a hit man. (kidding!!)<P>You will be in my thoughts today, as you are everyday. Let me know if there is anything that I can do! Take care!

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Bumper<BR> <P> <p>[This message has been edited by Bumperii (edited April 10, 2001).]

.<p>[This message has been edited by cinderella (edited April 09, 2001).]

{{{{{{CINDERELLA}}}}}}<P>I don't ever remember seeing you so upset, but you know what? It means you love your children and your venting . <P>We all have our days , and I don't ever let my ex see me mad either, I just come here and gripe. <P>The most important thing is your son getting the education he needs. That is an EXPENSIVE school! Then again, I never once looked into how much it costs for something like that. <P>I don't have any advice to offer since I have no clue about that stuff, but the only thing I can think of, is if the school knows the dad won't pay , if you can get perhaps, more financial aid, and possibly volunteer there for some help on the bill. I know a friend of mine does this in a catholic school where we live, but this school you describe does sound different, more specialized.<P>I wish I knew something that could help, but I can at least offer you a hug and tell you that your kids are in my thoughts and prayers.<P>Hugs (((((Cinderella))))))<BR>

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<BR>Bumper<P><p>[This message has been edited by Bumperii (edited April 10, 2001).]

Bumperii,<P>I have to jump in here to defend the princess. You have a personal bias, which i am glad you admit. however, to project your situation to 1) the use of the board as a place to vent anger so as not to vent at the "real people," i think you came to the wrong conclusion, and 2) to not support cinderella's goal of providing the best education, and therefore the best starting point for her children, is also unsupportable as a parental goal.<P>Everyone with koockoo X's continue to have frustration and anger when the X does not always have the best interests of the kids in mind. People express it at the board, and can be fine afterwards, but that does not mean that the MB member also takes it out on the people around them.<P>I personally was blessed with parents who believed that the number one "best thing" that parents can give their child that will last a lifetime, and give them the best start in the adult world, was the best education that they could afford.<P>so i think that not providing the best education for whatever reason is a parental crime, when the parent's could afford it, and knowing cinderella as i do, i would bet that her X could afford it, but is just being plain mean.<P>now my X is very similar, in that she teaches at a HS boarding school, tuition is $30K per year, and she wouldn't even discuss anything other than the public school for the kids with me, for several years, even though she hears horror stories about them, and admits that the school is terrible, so she is jepoardizing our kids' abilities to go because of her ???????? (i could list several qualities, but don't know which one is the correct one!)<P>now, my X dismisses anything i have to say because it is from me, (i am not a professinal educator, therefore my opinion has no value) so, use POJA, and nothing can happen, but time marches on. its a a tragedy that xparents often don't have their kids' best interests at heart, or that their kids must repeat their past because that's how they did it!<P>this topic makes me a bit ticked off too! as i have the same concerns about my X wasting our kids intelligence on her selfishness and blindness.<P>

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So sorry I am late in responding.<P>I am so glad that you have a place like this to vent and get the wonderful support you (we all) need. <P>There are no children involved in my case, and when I hear stories like yours, I am thankful. I really feel for the children, as they are so innocent in all of this.<P>Hugs to you,<BR>Petrie<P>On a lighter note, the names you call you x, crack me up, they remind me of the movie/book Misery. <P>One other thing, how is everything going today!<P>[This message has been edited by REJECTED (edited April 04, 2001).]<p>[This message has been edited by REJECTED (edited April 04, 2001).]

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<P> <BR><p>[This message has been edited by Bumperii (edited April 10, 2001).]

Bumperii,<P>"That's why I'm hoping you had the good sense to vent your anger here, and not on your ex."<P>That is why we are all here for each other isn't it? I am so sorry for the pain of your past. The experience must have been awful, not being "picked". Isn't it amazing what buttons still get triggered after the pain of our youth.<P>I never had the father I should have had either (long story) but 8 years ago, 6 months before his death we came to terms. "the best revenge is a life well lived". I poured what I should have had in a parent into my own children. Now they are 27 and 24, married with children with years of wonderful memories, in spite of being children of divorce.<P>cinderella,<P>Hang in there kiddo! I'm glad you came here to vent! I also have an x that said he was going to do everything he could to distroy me. He almost did but he will NEVER know it!!! I do understand the pressure you must be under as a parent. Keep doing the best you know how for your kids, your rewards will be returned to you three-fold, dispite what your x is trying to do now. Don't play his game, just keep in mind to do what you can face your kids with when they are married and parents themselves.<P>With respect to all, life just stinks sometimes, take the high road, you'll never regret it. <P>Ragamuffin

((((((Ragamuffin)))))<P>. <p>[This message has been edited by cinderella (edited April 09, 2001).]

Bumperii - Ragamuffin and Cinderella may have something here. If this thread triggers that much pain and anger that you treat Cinderella that way, this may be a thread that you need to avoid - or maybe you need to find a counselor and deal with some of your issues. Let's face it, everyone could probably use a counselor - even counselors seek therapy.

Bumper<BR><p>[This message has been edited by Bumperii (edited April 10, 2001).]

Bumper<p>[This message has been edited by Bumperii (edited April 10, 2001).]