OK,, here's the spill..<P>I found out my wife was having an A. I confronted her with it in 1. the wrong manner, and 2. the wrong place. A couple of days later, she filed for D. We are in day 9 of the divorce. Her reasoning behind it is that she is tired of the fighting, as I am also. We have been "fighting" by her definitions since Decemeber, we were married in June of last year. Her A started in December. So I suspect due to some other evidence I have uncovered. I can forgive her the A. I can learn to trust her again, yet, her course seems to be set. I have asked that we both go to marriage counseling, she has refused. With this in mind, I have basically conceded to the D on grounds of Irreconcilable Differences. I do not want to D my W. I do not want to loose her like this, or in any other way for that matter. I have not spoken to her in a week, where I used to call her 3-4 times a day. I have been looking at the things I personally am responcible for in our Marriage, and am taking steps to work on them. Is there anything else I can do to save this marriage that never really got it's chance to be a good one?<P>Thanks,<P>Vet

Sorry that it has taken awhile to get a response. Weekends are just real slow around here.<P>Read all the info on the website. Usually someone posts a greeting with links, but you can go to the home page and go from there.<P>I think you need to form a planA and work from there. <P>You can't force your W back into the marriage. But you can show her that you are willing to change. There are a lot of good books available to read and His Needs Her Needs, Surviving an Affair, and a book by Pittman called Private Lies. These books will give you great insight to your W affair and help you save you marraige. It is tough work and a rollercoaster ride of emtotion so hang on.<P>Come here for support and advice. This is the place to vent your anger and frustration!<P>Sorry that you are here under these circumstances.<P>Take Care.