My g/f is bringing her kids to town this weekend as her oldest(12) is in a local soccer tournament. They are playing at least 4 games this weekend, so I told her they could stay with us as my kids are home with me this weekend.<P>Her kids are each 1 yr younger than mine. Mine are 13(14 in 2 months) and 10. <P>I am sure the the 3 boys will get along fine, but my d and her attitude scare me. I don't know why, I guess that isn't fair to her. But I guess I can't blame her for not wanting to be around 3 younger boys. <P>My kids have their usual busy schedule with games at 12 and 1 on Sat. So I will have to be at two places at one time.<P>So I could use a few prayers this weekend!

You've got mine, Bob.<P>It's not easy blending families, and it's scary when you're hoping everyone gets along or, better yet, likes each other.<P>Have a GOOD weekend.<P>We have his kids this weekend, and although his young kids and my old ones have not yet met, it's tough being the "step" parent too... sigh... we ALL need prayers.<P>~Sheryl

Bob,<P>Many prayers coming your way...<BR>...for a challenging weekend.<P> <P>Jim

How about wishing you a nice weekend Bob? I have this feeling that it wil turn out OK.<P>Just relax & enjoy it. You deserve that.<P>Take care...<P>------------------<BR>nick<P>it's only time that heals the pain <BR>and makes the sun come out again

Bob,<P>You silly. You always have my prayers. But, may I offer a thought? My children are 14yo (son) and 11yo (daughter), and my son is also kind of driving me nuts right now. That's okay--that's appropriate for the age of early teenager. It's his JOB to drive me nuts. <P>However, being a female myself, I remember being 13yo and I am reminded every day of the pathos of early teen behavior. She will undoubtedly be upset that she has to tolerate the behavior of 3 "immature" BOYS ("OMG Dad, how could you?"). So why don't you make some special time for her or do something extra special just for her? I know you're crunched for time, and I know that she probably will roll her eyes and cross her arms and do that sigh thing. BUT, I bet underneath she'll appreciate the extra effort. <P>For example, so as not to embarrass her and be TOO uncool, why don't you get her a CD (something kind of new if she likes musice), or some other nice little thing she's been wanting as a surprise? Or, maybe let her go to a girlfriend's afternoon party on her own while you taxi the boys all around. Something that means, "I know you're putting out some extra effort here and I'm giving you a cool priviledge in exchange for putting up with these burpy, goofy boys." <P>Have a good weekend, and enjoy the games!!<P><BR>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

CJ,<P>Have you been watching my d?????? You have her down pat!!!!!<P>Bob

Bob,<P>I'm sitting at my desk giggling at work, and accounting just ain't that funny! <P>No, I do not have my crystal ball on today, BUT I was 13 once, I'm 10 years older than my youngest sister and I was 23 when she was 13 (so I remember how she was), AND I currently have a 14yo boy. If, in my old age, I remember correctly, the boys are about a year or two behind the girls in maturity, right? Of course, my ideas are soooooo old fashioned that it's scary, so I better look on the internet for REAL facts. Haha.<P>I don't know what to tell you except that I have one too, and every ounce of me longs to be told that I am not old, moldy, and disgustingly behind the times. I think I'm smart, young, worldly and hip!! <P><BR>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Hey Bob is it possible for your daughter to have a girlfriend around at least part of the weekend? My son is 13 (Faithful wife got a question regarding boys this age if your reading), my daughter is 8. My step daughter is almost 8 and step son is 6. The girls get a long great and the younger boy likes to hang with his father if he isn't acting like my son's shadow. I try when we are all 4 together to invite a buddy for my son and it tends to make things easier as far as the younger ones getting on his nerves. Now, faithfulwife- I think you mentioned having a young teenage boy. My son is a great kid. Good grades, polite and nice. But, geez....he is SO lazy that I can't stand it. He also likes to argue about the dumbest stuff. Do they all drive you nuts at this age???

you mean my 12 yo's not wanting to do anything, laziness, loud, mouthy, argumentative, very disrespectful, manner is NORMAL??<P>

BonnieSept,<P>Let's not steal Bob's thread if we need to "talk", but to briefly answer your question . . . YES!!! They all drive you crazy at this age.<P>My son is a genius--excellent grades at a 12th grade level--but he can't figure out how to clean his room. If we leave him alone in there for two hours, he will make his bed, kick his dirty clothes to the side, and then stand there and scratch his head for the remaining hour and 45 minutes! If we ask him to mow the lawn, he rolls his eyes. If we ask him to get the plates for the dinner table, he rolls his eyes. And yesterday, we had an argument over whether or not he ate lunch--he would not give me a definite answer! He just hemmed and hawed until I finally had to call his teacher at school. How hard is it to say, "No, I didn't eat lunch today"?<P>Anyway, when I was 23yo and my youngest sister was 13yo, it was like she suddenly went insane. NOTHING I did was right, NOTHING I did was cool, EVERYTHING I did embarrassed her in front of her friends, and SHE knew everything and I knew nothing! I remember thinking to myself, "What the heck happened?" Then I dug out my own journals from when I was 13yo and I realized what had happened! <P>So hang in there. It goes away when they are about 15yo.<P><BR>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Bob,<P>How long have you and gf been together? Are all the kids ready and ok with it? I'm assuming you met them, but you mentioned "coming to town". Have your kids met your gf?<P>Good luck! Dana<BR>

CJ,<BR>It really is scarry. Those actions or lack thereof describe my d perfectly. My 10 yo s is learning fast too!<P>Dana,<BR>My g/f lives 70 miles away, we have been seeing each other for 6 months now. I met her kids on New Years Eve which was a few weeks after our first date. She was working and I wanted to see her so I went and net her kids as well as her father. <P>We have dated only when the kids are at the other parents. I have gone up a few times for dinner with her and the boys during the week. <P>She met the kids one time when my x was late picking up the kids. It went alright, in fact I had trouble getting rid of my son as he struck up a conversation with her.<P>I have also brought g/f to my son's games when they are at their mothers.<P>We both have put the kids first as far as I have seen. We haven't gotten babysitter for them or missed any of their activities. I went to her son's band concert. His father brought him, but we were still there.<P>The kids seem to be alright about it. I asked my d to hang around and not disapper on us and that my g/f didn't want to be stuck with 4 guys all weekend.<P>D asked if she could go over to a friends tommorrow and she hung around here tommorrow. I said ok. Tonite she is having a friend sleep(?) over and I let her buy facial mud and eye stuff, so they are going to have a make over night. So maybe I will build some browny points that way!!!

Bob,<P>Sounds like you have things lined up. What a good idea to let your D get the makeup/mud stuff and have her friend over.<P>You know, the kids will probably all do fine. It will be you and GF who will propbably be the nervous wrecks!!!<P>I'll be praying for a good time to be had by all.<P>Take care, Desiree<P>PS BonnieSept, CJ and others, don't forget that teenage boys go through puberty, too, and that is where a lot of that behavior is coming from. Been there several times myself and survived!<P>------------------<BR>"Life is made up, not of great sacrifices or duties, but of little things in which smiles and kindnesses and small obligations, given habitually, are what win and preserve the heart and secure comfort."<P>Sir Humphry Davy<BR>

Hi Bob,<P>I've not had to go through this yet, but my prayers are with you.<P>In one way I hope to meet someone who has children - I seem to think it's easier. You know, there are his and mine, but no 'ours'.<P>I have this 'thing' about my children becoming second class citizens if I have another baby with someone else. I don't ever want to put them through that. They are too precious.<P>I think what you've done for your d is fantastic. She will appreciate it so much, and you will be the coolest!!!<P>Enjoy the time - and watch those new relationships betw. the kids develop. Let them find their way, and find out about each other. I hope for your sake (and your gf's) that they have things in common. I guess the boys will all have sport to talk about, that should keep the conversation flowing.........<P>Anyway, my thoughts and prayers will be with you. Relax and enjoy.<P>Hugs<P>Jo

Well, Bob,<P>how did it go??????<P>tom<BR>