I implemented plan A and B in my previous relationship and had the results that pretty much alot of people here pray for. The difference is that while implementing plan B I met someone who has totally swept me off my feet like no other. It had nothing to do about being alone. Feeling vulnerable or wanting someone to fill a void in my life.<P>When my ex wanted to come back,he wanted to do so because he noticed a change in me. I wasn't the same. I was happy. When he wanted to come back I felt that I couldn't do it. I know that in a letter I sent to him lastly I had said that I would accept him with open arms. But at that time I was still hoping but I was still very deeply hurt.<P>It's been maybe 6 weeks since this has happened. I've started seeing the man I met and I truly value the relationship with him. It's totally different. He treats me differently and i feel good about it. I guess I do feel bad that I have done all the work and changed my mind in the end. It might seem heartless but the only thing I can say to justify myself is that I've gone thru so much in my life I think I deserve some happiness.<P>But I can't help but ask myself was I being fair. Since then I know my ex has been seeing someone else. Which of course makes me beleive he didn't love me as much as he said he did.<P>It's not easy finding, being or staying in love these days. <P>------------------<BR>

Do I believe in love after love? Maybe. You should think really hard about taking a break from both partners. It's sounds like you're just really gaining confidence and the new relationships happiness may just be a by-product. It's also possible that you could experience that kind of happiness in your marriage and the newness of the other relationship is making it seem better than it really is. Either way I would put the outside relationship on hold till you REALLY know what you're feeling. Good luck!

Hi, I can't help but focus on the last thing you said in your post.<P>"Since then I know my ex has been seeing someone else. Which of course makes me beleive he didn't love me as much as he said he did."<P>If he turned around and said the same thing would it be fair? Because you have someone new in your life you must not have loved him as much as you said you did?<P>I'm not judging but i think it is something you should think about.<P>I new relationship has many exciting 'firsts' in it - did your relationship with your H start out that way? Exciting and adventurous? I agree with KBear that you would probably benefit from taking time away from both relationships.<P>But in the end, yes, you do deserve to be happy - just remember that regret can be a terrible thing, good luck!<BR>