My ex picked up our 2 boys (15 and 12) for Easter lunch at his moms. His "latest" girlfriend was with him. Since our divorce he has been divorced 2 more times and had several 6 week - 6 month girlfriends. My boys went out to the truck and showed him the things they had gotten in their Easter basket from me. He almost looked at me as if he hated me. I don't know why. He didn't get them a basket. He didn't get them a card. We bought a card and small gift for him from the boys and an Easter Lily for his mother and sent it with them. It is sad while they are gone sharing the time with him (glad they are, but I miss the family thing)I was very hurt at the fact that he doesn't even live with his kids (and hasn't for 9 years) and STILL doesn't think to get them an Easter card?? Why these people are so self-centered gets ALL OVER ME. He can have his new truck. He can take women out on dates. He can spend his money on alcohol. But he can't remember to spend a few bucks on his kids? <BR>We've been divorced 9 years and it still crawls all over me. It hurts. Its sad and the holidays are depressing for me when my children go off to spend some "family" time without me. <BR>I am remarried and have been for 6 years - but it does NOT take away the pain of families sharing holidays together as they should be.

Dear Cnty,<P>Been there, done that, and I'm glad to say that things got easier as the children got older. For the last six years Father would pay support only when served with a non-support order, Christmas and Holidays were for taking them away from what I had planned and always worked around his girlfriends which meant the children were made to stay with his parents.<P>Now the boys are 13 and 17 years old, things are much better. The problems worked out with me doing nothing.<P>When my oldest got his drivers license and car, he began to "NO" to the bad holidays with Dad and "NO" to planning his life around Dad's life. And of course the youngest went right along with his brother.<P>Now that the child are to old for a judge to tell them they must visit I stay clear and let the children do the rest.I no longer talk to ex about visitation I let the children do that.<P>As for advice, Never talk bad about their father but let the children see realty.All children want to love their parents no matter how bad or good they are but,there will be a day that your children will hold their father responsible for his actions.<P>Don't let the father or girlfriend (or wife) make you feel wrong for doing for the children. Be proud that you are doing what is right for them and if children have at least one good parent they have a chance.<BR>Good Luck