i've been separated for 6 months. i have a strong sex drive. my best friend has been so good to me and takes care of me through the bad times of this divorce. when her husband gets near me, i have started to get aroused by him touching me. he is just giving me comfort hugs. but i could do more, and need more, but don't want to hurt my best friend. he might not even want me, but i am now wanting him. should i be honest with my best friend about how her husband is naking me feel? he isn't doing anything wrong. i am just getting sexually aroused by him.

Bully,<P>I hope you didn't take offence to my reply to your post on the other thread. I really didn't mean to make light of your situation.<P>I do honestly believe that making a decision now in regards to relationships and sex would be a big mistake. You need time to heal and to work on you.<P>I am not really sure what you should do about your friends husband -in regards to telling your friend about your feelings or not that is - in regards to the husband you should definetly <B>steer clear</B>. You are vulnerable right now and craving male companionship; getting that need fullfilled from your friend's husband is not the right thing to do as I'm sure you already know.<P><BR>Try and keep things as distant as possible from him and make sure you are not alone with him. This could spell disaster if you are alone with him at a particlarily vulnerable moment.<P>As for the whole sex drive thing my advice from before still stands - although it isn't much for companionship sometimes it does the trick. <P>God Bless and Take care<P>Nicole<BR>

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by bully:<BR><B>when her husband gets near me, i have started to get aroused by him touching me. he is just giving me comfort hugs. but i could do more, and need more, but don't want to hurt my best friend.</B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>What you tell your best friend depends on how well you communicate anyway. Would you tell her if it was another close friend's husband you felt this way about? How long have you been acquainted with the husband? This is delicate territory, as far as you not wanting to cause any tension between your best friend and her husband. Are there any trust issues between them that you know about? Do you want her to be suspicious of you, or of him, whenever she doesn't know where you two are? My advice would be to not say anything to either of them ... AND ...<P>ABSOLUTELY avoid him as if he were the most toxic stain on the planet. This isn't about your needs, this is about your BEST friend's marriage now! Fantasize about some handsome stranger, movie star, etc. (NOT someone you know) and like PL suggested, stock up on batteries.<P>I am maybe the worst person of all to be giving advice because I also have a strong sex drive and very little control of who it chooses to obsess over. There is a married man at my church that I get a total body tingle whenever our eyes meet. I have a hard time doing it, as opportunities abound for me to talk to him or help out on a project he is also working on, but I ABSOLUTELY AVOID ANY CONTACT with him. I have to. You never know when they might also arrive at a weak moment, and SO many lives are hanging in the balance when you're teetering on that edge.