I am divorced from yesterday 10 am!<BR>Till last second I believed H would withdraw the papers but the judge said it's over. Now, I have to believe, 22 years are gone with the wind, 2 kids, love... OW won.<BR>How long it takes till the pain is gone,? Is that possible at all?<BR>Is here someone who reconciliated AFTER divorce?????<BR>Please help!

I am so sorry for your pain! <P>Actually, yes, there have been a few that have reconciled after divorce... in fact, one man (Frank, "PLEASE HELP") has reconciled after his wife married someone ELSE! <P>I'll see if I can find a link for you...<P>Hang tight!

Just click on the link below to read Frank's story:<P><A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum31/HTML/002650.html" TARGET=_blank> Frank's post</A>

Nyneve thanks,<BR>I am only afraid that such case is possible with women, I think at least in my country (in fact it's the same I believe everywhere), men are too proud to admitt they were wrong.<BR>About my exH (how hard is to write that) I am sure that he'd like to be dead rather to come to me again.<BR>When he does something that's it - point.<BR>We live in a small city where everyone knows his story so he will never be back.<P>BTW have you an idea how to plan A in such situation?<BR>Thanks<BR>D<BR>

I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry that you are having to go through this. I hope you can find some support here on this site.<P>Hang in there.

How in the Earth you survived your first year after D?<BR>I think I am going to die, I WILL die without him.<BR>22 of my 43 years I lived with him, I simply don't know how to live alone and raise my YD (11) who lives with me.<BR>I don't know how to return my OD(19).<BR>I don't know how to return him.<BR>I dont know how to rebuilt my marriage.<BR>I don't know how to plan A now.<BR>I don't know how to kill OW.<BR>I am lonely and confused.<BR>I only know I love him and only him.<BR>You dated, but I am to old and unatractive for anyone.<BR>I love him<P>

I know how hard it is right now to see anything positive out of this situation.. A year ago today I felt so hopeless and powerless too!! <P>I joined a divorce support group and went to church and prayed all the time and was with family all the time. That really helped me on aday to day basis. You have to take it minute by minute. <P>I did date but that really didn't alleviate the pain of the divorce and the betrayl. That only comes with time. And, the dating, only made matters worse in hindsight.<P>I felt the same way you feel right now after my divorce. Who will ever want me??. But, don't look at it that way. Try to love yourself through all of this. Don't let your x's actions control how you feel about yourself. You are lovable!!!<P>

{{{{{{{{{{{Darinka}}}}}}}}}}<BR>C'mon, now dear...stay with me. We are going to get through this if I have to swim there...I am not kidding here!<P>You must understand that J is an angry young woman....she does not know why, but yes, she is blaming you now. Its not right...its not fair, but it is reality.<P>No, S did not win...she's got a little boy to take care of now. Never underestimate the power of your former marriage, it is still with XH, and she has little to show for her time with him.<P>We have talked about pride before. That is XH's undoing, not a strength!<P>I am e-mailing you later...I LOST MY INTERNET ACCESS FOR A DAY...WRONG DAY, I KNOW!<P>You be strong, LadyD....M needs a strong Mom, give her that.<BR>MAJOR HUGS

Waiting for Her - thank you so much for your response.<P>"No, S did not win...she's got a little boy to take care of now. Never underestimate the power of your former marriage, it is still with XH, and she has little to show for her time with him."<P>I truly needed to hear that. Right now the OW has won, but I know in my heart that I was the best wife I could be to him, he just wasn't the best husband that he could have been. <P>Don't give up B&D on yourself. I too have all the same feelings that you have. It is a terrible way to feel about yourself. I am at almost the same place that you are - continually desperate myself. The only way I sometimes make it through the day is to take it one minute at a time. Take it one day at a time. Don't look to far into the future. If you let him, God will see you through. <BR>Love,<BR>TB

{{{{{TB}}}}}<P>Its easy to think that...I feel like the whole world has won, and I have lost. Now, I know that's not true, but that never stopped anyone from thinking it, did it?