Just some thoughts that I've been ruminating over lately... and some questions that I'm throwing out there to see if any want to take a stab at answering... not for my benefit only, but to get our sights focused on the appreciative for a few moments... what do you say? Heck, it may make the difference of a mediocre to a decent weekend!<P><B>Past - discovery and appreciation of it</B><BR>1. In your entire life, when have you felt more alive, most engaged in living? What were the factors that made it a great experience?<P>2. What are the *best practices* of the WAY you do things or the WAY you relate to people?<P><B>Future - Co-constructing the ideal</B><BR>3. What are the three most important hopes/wishes you have to heighten the health and vitality you as a person?<P>4. Using a metaphor, story, drawing or song, what image(s) captures your hope for YOUR future?<P><B>Present - What is happening today</B><BR>5. Imagine that someone extremely important to you came to tell you that the worst possible thing that could go wrong regarding your future? What is that thing? Are you prepared for it? How? Why or why not?<P>6. What do you value most about yourself?<P><BR>Now obviously I've focused on us as individuals but this process can be used for family dinner discussions, institutions, teams and well, our marriages... I'll post my answers later after anyone else feels led to think some of these things through verbally! <P>Have a GREAT weekend friends! Have I told you lately how much I <I>appreciate</I> all of you? In light of what we tragically learned today about Tanya/Tired Lady from her sister... I for one am counting my littlest blessings... anyone else?<P>Cheers, blessings and peace...<BR>Nicole<P><BR>------------------<BR><I>As iron sharpens iron, so does one wo/man sharpen another...</I> Prov 27:17<p>[This message has been edited by OvrCs (edited July 06, 2001).]

Okay, I'll go first.<P><BR> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by OvrCs:<BR><B>Just some thoughts that I've been ruminating over lately... and some questions that I'm throwing out there to see if any want to take a stab at answering... not for my benefit only, but to get our sights focused on the appreciative for a few moments... what do you say? Heck, it may make the difference of a mediocre to a decent weekend!<P>Past - discovery and appreciation of it</B><BR>1. In your entire life, when have you felt more alive, most engaged in living? What were the factors that made it a great experience?<P><I>Yes, there have been a number of times that I have felt more alive and/or more engaged in living. However, what I do have now is a deep appreciation for the things that I have. I have all of the usual problems with divorce, money, emotional, child custody, unending court appearances. But I also have 6 great kids, 2 great grandkids, a woman that loves me and that I love, A great mom and sister, good friends, a job that I like, a roof over my head, food in the refrigerator, etc, etc. All in all, things are pretty good. And I appreciate the things I no longer have. I don't have enough money, but I no longer have to worry about the ex spending it when we need to pay bills. I don't have to worry that she is smoking pot with the kids in the car. Etc, etc.</I><P><BR>2. What are the *best practices* of the WAY you do things or the WAY you relate to people?<P><I>My best practices? I am honest, sometimes brutally so, sometimes not. I feel that I am a person that others can rely on. If I say I am going to do something, it gets done.</I><P><B>Future - Co-constructing the ideal</B><BR>3. What are the three most important hopes/wishes you have to heighten the health and vitality you as a person?<P><I>1. A raise in my salary would go a long way to improving my mood.<BR>2. An end to the unending court appearances that force me to take a day off work to appear.<BR>3. More time to spend with my family.<P>Hmmm, short term goals here. Well, better than no goals at all.</I><P>4. Using a metaphor, story, drawing or song, what image(s) captures your hope for YOUR future?<P><I>I don't really think I have reached the point where I can make definite future plans. Still to painful to look back and realize the demise of what I wanted, but can not have (emphasis on wanted-past tense).<P>OK, I forgot the name, however, one of those theoretical psychologists called the stage that I am in generativity vs. stagnation (his name starts with an M, c'mon help me here. Not Maslow.) Where we impart our knowledge (as meager as it is) to the next generation. So much of my introspection has been around what have I learned. Mostly looking back.<P>So, the short answer is a song by the Beatles, "In My Life."</I><P><B>Present - What is happening today</B><BR>5. Imagine that someone extremely important to you came to tell you that the worst possible thing that could go wrong regarding your future? What is that thing? Are you prepared for it? How? Why or why not?<P><I>The worst possible thing that could happen is the death of one of my children. How do you prepare? You can't.</I><P>6. What do you value most about yourself?<P><I>The committment I have to my family and their well-being</I><P>Now obviously I've focused on us as individuals but this process can be used for family dinner discussions, institutions, teams and well, our marriages... I'll post my answers later after anyone else feels led to think some of these things through verbally! <P>Have a GREAT weekend friends! Have I told you lately how much I <I>appreciate</I> all of you? In light of what we tragically learned today about Tanya/Tired Lady from her sister... I for one am counting my littlest blessings... anyone else?<P>Cheers, blessings and peace...<BR>Nicole<P><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>What is that old saying (having serious memory problems today), "I was sad that I had no shoes until I saw a man who had no feet."<P>Take care all,<P>Brian<P>

Brian, I think the psychologist was Erik Erikson.<P>Nicole, I'm going to have to think about this one and reply later.