Just wanted to know that if I decide just to go about a separation, should my husb.and I have any contact during this time? Do we schedule counseling and only talk then? One reason I ask is that if I decide to do this, I don't want him comming to my home just to have sex with me.

What is the reason for the separation? I have seen a few recently and have some advice, but relations after separation are somewhat specific to the situation.<P>Are there kids involved? Is it a cooling off period, or has one of you lost commitment to the relationship? Or is it a legal separation involving division of assets, etc.?<P>My guess is that (and I am only commenting because you mentioned sex) that during a separation sex is not appropriate until such time as both spouses have an intent to work things out and reconcile. Once you start "dating" again it might be appropriate. But during a serious separation, any sort of behavior that looks like a relationship when one partner doesn't intend to have a relationship is deceitful. It will lead to confusion and more hurt feelings later, and could even prevent either you or your ex from moving on.<P>If there are children involved, go to a counselor and learn ways to communicate with each other constructively. You will be co-parenting for a long time and will have a lot of contact with each other. If there are no children involved, well, it might just be over. Zero contact may be appropriate in that situation.<P>Once someone leaves the house and the lawyers get involved, there is very little chance of reconciliation. The legal process is by nature adversial, and the lawyers are there to put their own kids through university, not yours. If you and your spouse are both honestly entertaining the idea of reconciling one day, try counselors, not lawyers.<BR>

I have to agree with Nonplused. If you want to try to work things out stay away from LAWYERS. They only destroy what little you have left, marriage and money.