MY time remaing with my STBX wife is dwindling down to a precious few days - maybe a couple of weeks if Im lucky - we have agreed on a settlement and she is moving out in mid-August - although we are on speaking terms she has completely withdrawn and dead set on following through with this divorce! <P>I told her that despite the fact that she does not want me to be her husband at this point, I will do my best to be her for her as a friend up until she moves out and/or the divorce becomes final! I made it clear that once one of those two events takes place, she will cease to be part of my life forever. This is the only leverage I have at this point since I believe my wife would love notjing more than to remain friends with me - this way she gets to have her cake and eat it too! <P>For more background, here is my full story: (http://www.marriagebuilders.com/forum/Forum8/HTML/004735.ht ml)<P>somebody please help me get back my wife - I feel like I need a miracle at this point - I just do not know how I am going to go forward without her in my life !!!!!<P>ACE

I apologize for not knowing your story, or have time right now to read - I'm just stoppin gin for a minute - but wanted to respond to you and help best I can.<P>I see you're still fairly new to MB. The basic fact is, if you don't want a divorce, you still have time to make some serious steps toward stopping it. You cannot control your W or her decisions. All you can do is work on yourself, based on the principles here, and demonstrate the changes to her. Plan B is not what you need here, but a textbook Plan A. make a list of HER top emotional needs. Not what you think she needs, but things that make her the happiest in life. Make EVERY effort you can to meet these needs. Make a list of everything that makes her angry, uncomfortable, or dis-like you. (Anger, nagging, begging, lecturing, asking questions, sarcasm, etc.) AVOID these at all costs. This sounds like you are ready to perform EMERGENCY surgery on your marraige. If that is true, you need to study these principles 24-7 and apply them. COme to this board, or better yet, the General Questions board - more traffic - and ask specific questions about your situation and things you are trying that seem to work or not work.<P>GO to the Just Found Out board and look for the post "Notable Posts/Threads". There's great links in there for all kinds of categories - including Plan A. Study and learn. It's not over until the judge says it is. You have time to make a difference. But you'll have to calm down, study, and take a good look at yourself and see what you can change for the better.<P>Hope this helps...