Help!!<BR>He says he feels nothing for me anymore.<BR>He has not separated himself from the OW. that he says he loves.<BR>He has lies to me and lied to me.<BR> After I found this web site I was starting Plan A- I think I have to go to B.<BR>I love him,that is what make this so hard.<BR>Help, What do I do?<BR>

Foolish,<P> I am sorry that you are going through this terrible situation right now. How long has this been going on? Have you tried couceling with a MC? <P>Indy

First welcome to out site. Everyone here has great advise. Not always what you want to hear. But always no judgemental and from experience.<P>Now, I am and have been going throught the same thing as you, except, my H has now split from the OW (she still lives next door), and has realized he loves me and perhaps his "love" for her, was not quite the "love" he thought it was. You husband is addicted to this OW. Please go to <A HREF="http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5525_qa.html" TARGET=_blank>http://www.marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5525_qa.html</A> and read! Search this entire web site, it will help you to undestand where he is at and where you are at.<P>Then, pull away a little and let him breath. Go do your own thing. If you still live together, go find a room and read, exercise, write poetry. Let him miss you a little, let him see that you are not following him around, not yelling, screaming, fighting for his attention. Sleep in another room. If he has moved out, don't call him. I know all of this is easy to say but not to do and I had to fight my own will to do these things. But I got my H back home with me. <P>You can get through this! Remember, work on yourself. Be the best person you can be every day. Don't point fingers or place blame.<P>My thoughs and prayers are with you.<P>Michelle<BR><p>[This message has been edited by eyes_wide_shut (edited August 02, 2001).]

Thank you so much for your replies.<BR>As tears stream down my face,you have given me some hope. I am so happy for you eyes wide shut that your husband has come back and says he loves you. I long to hear those words again.<BR>A little back ground-<BR>sept 2001 will be 13 years of marriage<BR>from about april/may 2000 Husband tried to get the four of us together to be friends. (The OW as of may 2001 filed for divorce.)<BR>From day one I had that uneasy feeling about her. (I knew them what kind of person she was but...) Husband had said what a good friend she was at work. I know you have heard this story too many times. On our first(me and the now OW) conversations she told me she was "Looking out for My Husband while He was at work, keeping very friendly women away from him. HA she wanted him all to herself. I even told my Husband my concerns. He said "she is married too and is JUST A FRIEND.<BR>I thought he was having an affair soon after that.<BR>But was told no just friends,I knew he was having a verble affair at the least, so I withdrew. I thought I was letting him get it out of his system.<BR>After I caught him on the cell phone in our driveway.Sept 2000, A fight @ halloween 2000. when he said if it were not for the kids he would be gone. I knew then and only then how unhappy he was. Night and day October 30th happily married<BR> Oct 31 he is out of love and would leaveif it was not for the kids. <BR>I was lost.<P>We started MC Jan. 2001. I was too gunhoe. He went to see if he had any feelings for me.<BR>February or March , the full monty affair had begun.<P>From Sept 2000-I watched, I told him what was going to happen and everything played out like a bad book. <P>He has disrespected me since summer 2000.<BR>The fool I am - I still love him.<P>Any words of help are welcomed! Thank you. God Bless.