Well...a bit confused here so bear with me if my story is a little choppy.<P>Found out my wife was cheating on me with an internet lover. no real physical contact, but the emotional infidelity hurt me worse. She says that she did this because I wasnt meeting her needs, which is true. I come from a background where talking about problems and feelings just wasnt a thing that was done. So..into counseling I go. Finally into counseling. Things are going good for awhile, then she does it again. Saying that I wasn't meeting her needs. 5 weeks into counseling and I should be cured? <P>Well...for some reason I still want to stay together...still havent figured out why..and she is confused. She says that she loves me and wants to be with me, but her brain is telling her that I won't change. But..she hasnt moved out yet, she still talks about us having kids, etc, etc...but there is no intamcy between us. No touching, hugging, or kissing or anything. <P>So..she says she is staying until "something happens"..what the hell is that? something good? something bad? she says she doesn't know...just something.<P>I feel like I am on puppeteer strings being danced around. I feel like that I have to do everything to prove to her that I have changed without her even lifting a finger...its very frustrating and keeps me on emotional pins and needles. Why can't she decide?

I found this site way after my divorce. But everyone here says to go to Plan A in the MB (marriage builders)section. How long have you been married? If you know you are not meeting her emotional needs, are you trying to now? Do you even want to? You must feel pretty betrayed knowing she found the emotional support she was seeking on the internet. Will she at least talk to you? She should go to counseling with you if she still loves you. Sounds like both of you don't want a divorce, but something has to give somewhere and if both are not willing to compromise then the problems will not go away -- only get worse. Wish I could be of more help. Good luck.

I think you both need to do some C. <P>Was she able to communincate what needs you are not meeeting? <P>Tex.