It has been a few days since I finally made up my mind to divorce my WS. I had cried, begged, pleaded, then discovered this website and implemented Plan A. When she was still talking to OM I made up my mind, it was over.<BR> Apparently this finally got through to her because she called me on the way to work to tell me to set up marriage counseling. I had planned on visiting a lawyer that morning to file for divorce.<BR> Here is my dilemma: I have kind of been in a withdrawal/Plan B mode since that day. She is the only one who initiates contact, and now she calls me a lot and tries to find me so we can do things together. But what confuses me is that she asks me for favors all the time now. Why is she always calling and asking me to do little favors for her?<BR> Is she testing my resolve? Does she think I was putting up a front when I told her "this is it"? I wonder if my giving her favors are a sign of weakness. I am following Plan B very strictly; I have not called her once in five days. She is the one initiating contact and being very nice. I am just having a hard time understanding her intentions.<BR> Maybe I am over-analyzing this whole situation. Any thoughts?

AGM, I would think that is what Plan b is all about. Yes, she may be testing your resolve. Or, maybe Plan b worked and she really does want to get it back together. In either case I would suggest you stick to your guns. <P>Go to counsuling w/ her. If she blows you off then the old addage "Fool me once shame on me, Fool me twice shame on you." <P>If you want her back you need to you owe it to yourself to do this one more thing. As proof to yourself that you did everything you could do to get it back. <P>My .02$<BR>Tex.

Has she told you she has broken in off with the OM forever?<P>If not, like AgoodManInTexas said, stick to your guns. You are getting the desired result. <P>IMHO, she's only trying to keep you on the hook because she still doesn't know what she wants. You are off the hook now and she is desperate.<P>Since you are doing a Plan B now, did you tell her that you love her, but can't be with a person who does what she is doing?<P>IMHO, until she says she has broken it off with the OM forever AND more importantly, backs it up with action and wants to work on the marriage, stay your course. Until the OM is TOTALLY out of the picture, there is not chance for recovery.<P>Kevin<BR>(Another good man in Texas)

Maybe she's trying to see if you really love her and are willing to work on the marriage..<P>I don't know your story..so I can't really say..but maybe she's trying to see if you are a man of your word..have you often said you'd do something and then not followed through with it? I know that for me..(I was the W/S) and my stbxh would say he'd do something and then wouldn't do it until I said I was going to hire someone else to do it..and he told me for years that he would find another job that would allow him to be home more than one weekend a month...sooo as the w/s listening to a b/s I was looking more for actions than simply just words..the words didn't mean squat to me..<P>I finally called him on his words in Sept. of last year..I told him either find another job..or find someplace else to stay that one weekend a month your in town..he chose the latter..and took two weeks vacation and moved out..again his actions spoke louder than his words..even after he moved out he kept saying he wanted to "work" on the marriage..yet..his actions didn't show this..I'd ask him to help me fix things up around the house..he'd say he would come help..but never did..so maybe..she's looking at your actions...and not just your words..sometimes words are just full of hot air..