Hi guys ~<P>Ok, I'm just sitting here a tad bemused. I don't "get" men, much less little boys.<P>My H has been on a business trip for 3 days, and I've been taking the opportunity to get a number of things done around the house that I haven't been able to attend to.<P>He's on his way home tonight. So this afternoon, I'm running around doing the housekeeping that I've neglected while he's been away.<P>And what do I discover on my 10 year old's night stand?????<P>An old potato chip bag, you know the kind you get from the variety snack packs? And this potato chip bag is full of what I think is water. My 8 year old frequently leaves water all over the house in EVERYTHING.<P>So I take this bag and go to pour it in the sink before tossing. And it SMELLS and its YELLOW. <P>WHAT ON EARTH POSSESSES A TEN YEAR OLD TO STORE HIS URINE ON HIS NIGHT STAND IN AN OLD POTATO CHIP BAG???<P>Please, its not much I'm asking for right now, just a little sanity!!!<P>When questioned, my son busted up giggling, turned bright red, and said "I don't know."<P>------------------<BR><I>Pain is a given, misery is optional.</I>

ROTFLMAO in the church office.<P>You know, I don't understand men, either. And I don't even understand my son. But he has to be the sweetest thing....<P>And as frustrated and angry as I get at his father and as much as I don't like men occaisionally and as much as I could just swear that womankind would be better off without men, I look at him and know he was sent to me for a reason. And that my job is to raise him to be healthier than his dad. So I better get over how I feel about his father and the projection of this anger, sporadically, on men in general.

OMG BR!!!<P>And I thought my sons were the only ones to think of things like that! LOL LOL LOL<P>Mitzi

Well...it's a guy thing, I suppose!!! I've always been intrigued by the fact that my son has NEVER been able to urinate if I am present, but he can if his dad is there... must be some sort of biological thing !!!!

Hold on there, a minute...I do not recall 'storing' any sort of bodily secretions anywhere, at any time, and I've never heard of this before, so calling it a guy thing, well...that's just not cricket, love!<P> Although, I do concede that...statiscally, if this behavior is categorizable along gender lines <B>only</B>, it would be a 'guy' thing, I suppose. -Mike<P><p>[This message has been edited by waiting_for_her (edited August 16, 2001).]

LOL, well Mike, please show me the 10 year old girl that looks at a potato chip bag, and thinks: "Hmm...I should pee in that!"<P>Besides, physically speaking - I doubt I could manage *cough* a little potato chip bag. Those little cups at the OBGYN's office are bad enuff!!<P>------------------<BR><I>Pain is a given, misery is optional.</I>

Oh Mike you made me laugh...and for today, that is REALLY something!!!!<P>I still think it's a guy thing. What self respecting girl would do it anywhere but the proper place??? I have two girls, that have been BUSTING (frequent in Mozambique, because there ARE no decent toilets) and they will not pee on the side of the road, or anywhere else!!!<P>You guys can just hang it out there and go for it.<P>By the way, do you wanna know how Mozambican women do it???? No I guess you don't!!!

I know...I know...that's why I could not resist! Don't ask me that one! Its one of the few times I'll say...I have no idea. Richard Pryor (before the freebasing accident) had an excellent routine about women peeing in the woods...and our (men's) propensity (watch those letters there, Mike) for spelling our names, and such. No fair giving the set up, and just leaving <I>it hanging</I>, Jacky! Let's have it!<P>In May, before the D, my oldest son had a friend over, and my XW was in the (only) bathroom blasting the Dixie Chicks, and getting ready to go out...blah-blah-blah, but this friend 'had to go'...so he 'went' on the side of my house....in front of my 65 year old neighbor's living room window! I went out to see what the yelling was about, and my nieghbor is reading this 15 year old the riot act...it was a good break in that day for me! (Although, ultimately, it was fairly embarassing for me...but, hey...I wasn't the one pissing in my lilac bush, so.... ) -Mike<p>[This message has been edited by waiting_for_her (edited August 16, 2001).]

OMGS this is too much:<BR>Mike for your info I do think it is a guy thing to relieve themselves anywhere just becuase they have better aim.<P> My son was at my father's house one day and he has lots of property. Well anyway Chantz had to go pee so it was to far away from the house. My father told him to pee behind the shed. Well that was all fine and good except for he was outside playing in the sandbox one day at my house and had to go pee I told him to go upstairs. I turned around and there he is peeing outside the sand box (good thing it was not inside). Let me remind you he did this about 10 feet away from main st.. My first reaction was "what are you doing" he said but, Mommy pappy told me I could pee outside cuase I'm a boy..<BR> Ok Mike.... Let me hear it.. Go ahead I'm ready for ya..<P>Janet

Okay, but remember you asked for this!<P>Here is nother recent one. I know a very bitter man the same age as me, and in July, I had a little impromptu marguerita party to pick my spirits up. This man and I are on my back deck, grilling dinner, and he decides to go pee on my STRAWBERRY PATCH!...I mean the bathroom was empty, closer...and after all, a room designed for that almost exclusively! This man is that boy's uncle....hmmmmm?<P>And before BR, or anther beats me to it, if our aim is so good, what's up with the mess on and around the seat? -Mike<P>

As you can see, I came here to bury Caesar, not to praise him!<P>You all might just as well bring it all on now, I am here to take it <I>all</I>, because much of it is a huge mystery to me, as well. -Mike

Does anyone wonder why its a MAN that has all these pee stories for us? <P>------------------<BR><I>Pain is a given, misery is optional.</I>

Well actually Mike if you would lift up the seat you wouldn't pee on it.<BR>Janet

Ha Ha <P>Slightly off topic but it reminded me of a patient I was taking care of once (im an RN). I went into his room to check on him and he was sitting there holding on to his urinal.....he held it out to me and asked me for more water (he had drank his own urine). All the nurses were hysterical laughing from the unit as I stood in there going "no no...this cup is for drinking...this thing is for peeing"<P>Another patient stated that his breakfast was wonderful..but he didnt really care for "kentucky Jelly". "kentucky Jelly?" I asked....then I looked down and found a pack of KY jelly...empty.

EEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW how gross!!!!!!<BR> I work on an ambulance and used to work in nursing home never had anyone drink from their urinal... YUK!!!<BR> Most of the time I just get a patient in the back that as soon as we get on the road they have to pee.. (all the old one's do anyway in their diapers). But yuk yuk yuk......<P>Mike help out with this one will ya.. This is right up your alley.. lol<BR> Janet

BR,<P>Dear lady, where have you been? I was wondering where you got to.<P>The bag of pee is a cute twist. Don't bother to try to understand it. It is just a sign of the times. They didn't have those tiny little chip bags when I was a kid. <P>But every elementary school custodian has a story about the boys room, and two or more boys peeing all over the walls trying to see who can pee the highest or the furtherest.<P>And more than a few have tried peeing in a pop or beer bottle. Back in the sixties when the women's lib crowd was claiming "anything you can do I can do better" every drunk in the bar yelled back at the TV, "Let's see you pee in a beer bottle!<P>And cmon, guys, who hasn't tried writing a little something in the snow? Hasn't anyone heard the joke about the yellow note in Hillary's handwriting?<P>Kids sometimes get ideas from the nuances of the english language. I guess maybe in the fifth grade we heard about Hispanic custom of fighting chickens referred to as a ---- fight. We thought that it was something like sword fighting with a portion of the anatomy. Had a terrible time trying to figure out just exactly how that was done.<P>Now that we live in the age of random drug testing, and every few months, some dweeb from Internal Affairs actually shows up at my office demanding a cup of pee. <P>Prayers and stuff,<P>Bumper

What a great thread...making me LOL, and I really need it right now...<P>MIKE!!! Now remember, YOU wanted to know this, so apologies to everyone else!!!<P>Mozambican ladies; everyone walks everywhere there, with big bundles of sticks on their heads and usually a baby on the back in a sling. Their hands are usually free. They all wear those wrap around tie skirts, we call them sarongs, I don't know if that's the same for you.<P>So when they need to pee, they just kind of stand with their legs apart, hitch the sarong and away they go....truly a sight to see!!! Obviously they must't wear knickers!!!<P>

Sarongs...yes, its the same...and yes, I did ask for that one, didn't i? I can see how that one managed to attract your H's attention...that's 'swimming in sex appeal' to me, I think my recent celibacy has some real meaning now. <B>Thanks</B>, but now I was going to let you ladies bash away without defending myself, but I can't...Janet, I have <B>always</B> been aware of the proper etiquette with respect ot up when you use it, down when you're done. Its not really complex, just requires an occasional thought about someone else's reality, which has never been a problem for me. Like Elvis Costello, 'My Aim Is True' -Mike<P>BTW, Janet...I dunno, I'm still trying to imagine taking the <B>second</B> bite of my toast with the 'Kentucky Jelly' on it!<p>[This message has been edited by waiting_for_her (edited August 18, 2001).]

LOL LOL LOL<P>Never thought of HER in that way before....yes some of his decisions in the last year have been dubious at best. Who knows, maybe they had p*****g contests as a fun type recreation. Not gonna go there.....<P>Up or down? Why does that annoy so many girls? If it's up when you get there, just put it down again!!!<P>As to missing, my son was a terrible aim until we put a ping pong ball in there, and told him to fire at will. Improved a lot!!!!

XLNT idea...like target practice!<P>I was going to say that the immediate image I got was that of a horse, but that's a little too rich, I think!<P>I think the other issue has more to do with how someone feels when <I>they</I> don't check <I>first</I>, and get 'caught' with it up! You see, everytime we do <I>mindless</I> things, and they don't pan out, we need to place blame elsewhere...no, not so funny, but I think that it explains the difference I refer to almost daily here:<BR> Some people cannot exist outside of their own version of reality. 'Bubble Boy' is alive and well! Others cannot imagine not venturing outside once in a while. That basic issue causes everything that springs forth from it to reflect the basic 'like me, good; not like me, bad' attitude that many people have. -Mike