I do miss farming, and if I could turn back time I would have done just about everything possible to avoid having to give it up. However, on days when it was twenty below zero, all the pipes in the barn were frozen solid, we had to carry several 5 gallon buckets of water to each and every cow, and the calves were scouring, dreamy was not exactly the word that came to mind. On the other hand, on nice summer days when we looked out the kitchen window at the cows grazing in the fields....

I am curious,<BR>You spend SOOO much time talking about your ex-husband,<BR>putting him down about the affairs HE had ( don't forget, you had one too- he can hurt over that too ) and just plain bashing him left & right,<P>How much attention are you paying to your NEW marriage?<P>MM

Well, MistyMae,<P>Am I bashing David? I didn't think so... <P>You don't know me, so you don't know that I've been here for two years, at first working on my marriage to David, and hating myself for my affair. I've beat myself up more than you can possibly know... <P>Of course he hurt over my affair, very deeply in fact. I never said he didn't. Also, even on this thread, I said how much I once loved him. We were married for 20 years, and there was a reason or two we stayed together that long.<P>My new marriage is based on MB principles, to be sure. We are just beginning, so honestly, we're still in the honeymoon stage.<P>I'm curious why you ask?

Hello again, Misty,<P>I went back through this thread with a fine toothed comb, and I really didn't see anything that I'd said that was blasting... I also didn't talk about my affair, so I assume you did a search on me, or have read my posts without replying. Perhaps you've noticed that I've had a very difficult time, of late, with taking so much that is said here to heart. I have been very introspective, trying to find a balance in my life. <P>What you have written was meant to sting. I have to ask why?<P>I did a search on you, and you've only written one post before, asking about Keridwen. That was 2 weeks ago. This is what you chose to post next.<P>Why, why me, Misty? Please tell me, I'd like to know. If you're still around, that is.<P>If you have a marriage story to share, MB is the place for you... I hope you will remain and contribute...

Sheryl,<P>Please don't be hurt by Misty's post! Those of us who have been here know how much you loved David and how hard you tried to keep your marriage intact. You have not been bashing David, you have been honest with how things truly were in your marriage. <P>Misty,<P>Sheryl is a very loving and kind person. She doesn't say anything here with the intent to harm anyone. She has talked often about her own affair and not just David's. <P>Mitzi

<BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>Originally posted by Mitzi:<BR><B>Sheryl,<P>Please don't be hurt by Misty's post! Those of us who have been here know how much you loved David and how hard you tried to keep your marriage intact. You have not been bashing David, you have been honest with how things truly were in your marriage. <P>Misty,<P>Sheryl is a very loving and kind person. She doesn't say anything here with the intent to harm anyone. She has talked often about her own affair and not just David's. <P>Mitzi </B><HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Mitzi,<P>I don't suppose it would be appropriate to reach through this screen and kiss you?? <P>Thank you for the kind words and affirmation.<P>You know my heart, and you know how sensitive I've been lately. It was hard not to take as a personal attack. My problem, I know. <P>But, THANK YOU. You made me feel MUCH better!! <P><BR>

Eeeeewwwww, more mushy gushy girly stuff!

Hey Paul!<P>We're allowed some mushy, gushy, girly stuff once in a while! <P>Sheryl,<P>You're definately welcome! <P>Mitzi

Sheryl! Sheryl!<P>{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Sheryl}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}<P><BR>Did you know that almost nothing that people do or say is about YOU, it is a reflection of their reality? Don't take it personally, because it's not really about you at all.<P>You know, there are those of us around here who have been here long enough to know all the times you struggled and cried and longed for David. There are those of us here who know how desperately you wanted to save your marriage and your family; and we also know that in trying so hard you came darn close to losing YOU! So, don't forget that some newcomers may not know all the facts. <P>That being said, I think Misty was (clumsily?) trying to point out that we all contribute to the problems in our marriages. David may be a verbally and emotionally abusive womanizer, but at least one time you did hurt him too. None of us here is able to cast the first stone. Even me!! haha <P>Last but not least, with regard to feeling guilty because you gave up, you know what? STOP IT!!! Girl, you tried and tried and tried until your finger bled! Sure you made mistakes and didn't do a perfect job, but I think at some point you finally realized that the essence that is YOU was going to die if you did not get out of there. <P>You didn't "give up"--don't forget, there were two at that dance, and your partner was dancing with every other partner in the city! You couldn't save the marriage by yourself, you were starving and dying for some loving attention, and you made a mistake. FORGIVE YOURSELF!! We have! <P>Because of this mistake, though you also finally realized a very good truth: you are loveable and worthy of respectful, safe, gentle love. That is when you made a decision to stop dancing the same old dance and do a new dance, and David did not want to dance the new dance. To this day, he wants to dance the old dance and he keeps on trying to goad you into it!<P>So, Sheryl, get out one of your chill pills, girl, and settle down. We love you--now YOU love you!<P>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

Hi Paul, Hi Mitz, and thanks so much for the 's today -- well, actually it is now tomorrow! Yeah, it's pretty late, hubby working graves and I'm just about to the point where I can stay awake and sleep when he does... pretty lonely existence sometimes though.<P>OOOOOHHHHHHH CJ,<P>Did I call out for the best picker-uper a girl ever had? Because you are HERE!! <P>Thank you for the reality check and for reminding me to take those chill pills.<P>I take everything to heart -- gotta stop, gotta stop.<P>Just working on the "how"... <P>Love ya!!