<BR>Hard to believe that with everything settled, except one minor adjustment to the custody order, we will walk out of the courthouse tomorrow morning divorced.<P>Prayers please, from anyone who has a few to spare. I pray to please let the judge see things as they are, be fair and rule in the best interests of the children involved.<BR>

Who could ask for anything more?<P>Hugs, Thoughts, & Prayers from Kansas<P>------------------<BR>Love, Bill<P>-There are none so blind as those who refuse to see!-<BR>-Stand up and do the right thing, even if your standing alone.-

T-L-C,<P>First and foremost, know that you will DEFINITELY be in my prayers tonight and tomorrow. This has been such a long and difficult road for you, and I am so proud that you two were able to settle everything. <P>I always pray for the judges, because they have people's lives in their hands, and I think sometimes they can become complacent or routine about it. I pray for godly wisdom to do what is best for the children and best for both parties involved.<P>So, would you like a card to celebrate or a box of tissues?<P><BR>CJ<P>------------------<BR>Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

<BR> <BLOCKQUOTE><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><HR>So, would you like a card to celebrate or a box of tissues?<HR></BLOCKQUOTE><P>Well, it was supposed to be a one Tequila Sunrize night, but fate threw a wrench into that plan.<P>It didn't go down quite like I wanted today. The judge had an ugly neglect case to deal with, and it took precedence over everything else. S(upposed)TBXH and I, through our attys, worked out all of the details of our settlement except one, and the attys met with the judge during a break and he decided it - but didn't have time to do anything more and we were rescheduled. So I won't be "divorced" now until Sept. 6 or 7. I won't have to be there, it will just need to be signed.<BR> <BR>S(upposed)TBXH has 120 days to get financed and buy me out (he wants to keep our land) or we sell it. All of our marital debts stay in my name (*yuck* there is a LOT), and I have to pay them out of the money I will get when the property sells or he gets financed (for half our land's appraised value, plus half of the marital debts).<P>That's about it. Custody stays basically the same as the temporary order. I was just really really looking forward to having it officially "over" - but like everything else, I'm sure this delay is for a good reason, even though I don't know what that might be right now. :-/<BR>

Join the crowd. I was offically divorced July 10th. Had to go back to court Aug 13th and have a custody battle set for Sep 11th. I'm just so ready for this to be over. <P>All good things come to those who wait. Whatever the heck that means.<P>Hugs, Thought, and Prayers from the land of OZ<P><P>------------------<BR>Love, Bill<P>-There are none so blind as those who refuse to see!-<BR>-Stand up and do the right thing, even if your standing alone.-

As long as he signs the settlement his attorney is typing up, and as long as there is nothing slipped in there that I am going to have a problem with (there should NOT be since the judge has already given our settlement the nod) I just have to go in and sign it before September 6, and then the judge signs it and we are done.<P>Done.<P>Very strange feeling of the unreal creeping over me. I've been looking forward to this for almost a year, and now it's here.<P>I am really surprised the summer flew by as fast as it did. I thought it would drag, especially those weeks without my kids. The 16th will be one year since the event that made me realize I was worth so much more than what I had become. (The VSTBX launched into a verbal tirade and topped it off by spitting in my face THREE times and threatening to kill the kids' pets if I called the cops. How do you 'get over' that?!)<P>He said if I left I'd never get custody of the kids. I did.<BR>He said if I left I'd never make it on my own. I am.<BR>He said if I left I'd never find someone who would love me like he did. Thank God. My boyfriend loves me and my VSTBX was right, it is NOTHING like the way he did.<BR><p>[This message has been edited by T-L-C (edited August 30, 2001).]

<BR>Still not divorced.<P>We had a 'pro con' and put our agreement on the record, but because of his atty (grrr) we didn't have a final copy for the judge to sign so we won't be divorced (grrr) until she gets the corrections right (grrr) and then we both sign the thing and get it before the judge.<P>Then he signs and we're divorced.<P>Whenever all that happens.<BR>

<BR>Closer to done.<P>The papers were corrected and he and his atty signed last Friday. My atty got them today and we both signed. Now they get sent to the courthouse... so within the week I'd estimate, the judge will sign and it will be <I>formally</I> over.<P>There is a lot of relief already. Just a lightening of the heavy load. Unfortunately right after I left my atty's office I found out about the terrorist attacks and I've been in shock all day about that. It is hard to even consider other things in life right now.<P>Try to tell a six year old what happened today and why. :(<P><P>------------------<BR>T-L-C<BR>------------------<BR><I>"You don't really know a person you love until they don't love you anymore.<BR>Then you know more than you ever wanted to."</I>

[QUOTE]Originally posted by T-L-C:<P><BR>(The VSTBX launched into a verbal tirade and topped it off by spitting in my face THREE times and threatening to kill the kids' pets if I called the cops. How do you 'get over' that?!)<P>TLC, <P>Wow! He actually topped my husband on that one. What a sick sick man. <P>[QUOTE]Originally posted by T-L-C:<P>He said if I left I'd never get custody of the kids. I did.<BR>He said if I left I'd never make it on my own. I am.<BR>He said if I left I'd never find someone who would love me like he did. Thank God. My boyfriend loves me and my VSTBX was right, it is NOTHING like the way he did.<P>TLC,<P>HOW INCREDIBLY WONDERFUL!!! Thanks for making me laugh with the last line too about him being right. HOW FUNNY!!!<P>Ok now I have a question for you or anyone else who wants to answer. I am not yet divorced but I think it should happen in about a month. I'm so worried about dating, but it didn't stop me from going out last weekend on my first date. In one way I miss that companionship so much and in another respect I think I should wait until after the divorce is final. BTW, we separated in June of this year. I had a lot of fun and at first it seemed to really cheer me up, but now I have had a hard time all week. A very hard time! I think it was because of the date. Did you find it hard to date at first? Does this get better as you go? Any advice on dating? It seems so easy for me to give advice to others and so hard for me to know what to do with my own situation...<BR>ANNA<BR>

<BR>It may not seem so to look at my recent dating history, but it is very hard for me to be in a casual, dating relationship. I have SO MANY issues due to my history with my ex. <P>If you decide to date, <P>1.) you must tell your date that you are not yet divorced - you owe them this honesty (please be aware that with some unscrupulous men, they will see you as an easy conquest!) - if this guy cares about you and stays with you during the final divorce proceedings, it is like they are going through the pain with you - and it could be too much for a new growing relationship to handle<P>2.) you must expect that you WILL compare every man you date to your ex ... often unfairly, and they won't like it! There will be misunderstandings. You will talk about your ex and things they do or places you go will remind you of your ex. It's hard to get close to someone AND stifle every comment that comes to mind.<P>I have the problem that I am so comfortable with my boyfriend, I start to share with him things I would share with a friend about my ex ... and he doesn't want or need to hear these details!!<P>I have also admitted to him that I was sorry I got involved with him before the divorce was final. I meant it as I am sorry he has had to go through this crap with me. He took it differently. He asked me if he hadn't been supportive, if it hadn't been nice to have him around ... oh it broke my heart that he thought I didn't WANT him around during these trying times.<P>You just separated in June? Think about it ... it hasn't been that long, although time might seem to crawl when you're alone.<P>After the judge has signed our papers, I'm going to collect and compile my writings and emails to friends and family and atty and more ... and put together some webpages that will hopefully help others that are going through this.<P>I love my boyfriend. I'm so glad he's in my life. But, I know I should have waited AT LEAST until the divorce was final, and maybe longer, before I started dating. Some things only become clear in hindsight!!<P><P>------------------<BR>T-L-C<BR>------------------<BR><I>"You don't really know a person you love until they don't love you anymore.<BR>Then you know more than you ever wanted to."</I>

(((((((TLC)))))))))<P>It's been a long road. I'm sorry to hear of the news. I'm also sorry I lost track of your emails a while ago, I was having trouble with my hotmail account. Plus, life has been kinda crazy lately. Good luck tomorrow.<P>Prayers and hugs, Dana<BR>