Phoned children this afternoon . As expected my eldest told me that the uncle slept over again. ( Whats new) What upset me was that this uncle apparently hit my youngest sun because he would not get out of bed at six o’clock this morning. This has really got me angry, iwant to throttle this uncle . I phoned my lawyer and they have noted his action. Im now prepared to go to war in court. This so called wife has just given me up for this man and now IM not sure that she will even give up the kids ?<BR>It just does not make sense as before this s**t started my wife was so loving to me and she was one of the best mothers one could get to the kids. What has happened. Where did the woman go who I fell in love with 10 years ago ? <P>I have tried Plan A , Plan B to no avail. What more can a person do. I just cannot standby and watch what is going on. My kids are getting hurt and IM getting annihilated .I was still prepared to pay my wives clothes account, Food, policies and debit orders on my account and to find out this Uncle is living in our house and sleeping in my bed, What a fool Ive been. I always had hope that maybe shell come back. But after finding out about the affair I don’t care. People and my councilor have told me that an affair in this situation will not work, shell be back. The problem is now I don’t want her back. She has lied and deceived me taken me for a ride , I wouldn’t put it past her to ask me if this uncle can keep my car or even to support him.<P>I am quite new here to this site and Ive just got a question to ask. How many out there have used plan b and waited it out and there partner has returned. Also I would like to know how can one except ones spouse back after an affair. I personally can not do this, as she was the one who betrayed my trust and shattered our family. I will always love her and will always remember the good times even though it hurts, but for me to carry on with my life I Have to cut all ties and look forward for my kids and myself. My believe in life is when one door closes two open and maybe this is the biggest favor she has given me, who knows maybe one day Ill find a person out there with the same values as myself and she will treat me the same as I treat her. Until then I will just have to deal with the pain and learn how to accept what has happened in my life.<BR>

Hi NWTCO...<P>My heart just breaks for you... it's incredibly painful what your wife is doing. Please don't do anything rash... you say you don't want her back... that's likely because of your highly charged emotions.<P>I too would be upset about *uncle* hitting my son! You've got to get the kids outta there or something.<P>Keep walking day by day... your pain is a killer right now but you can survive... post here... vent here... complain here... just stay calm with her.<P>She is in la la land right now... it's so painful, I'm sure. Just guard your heart right now... be there for your kids... imagine the pain and confusion they must be feeling...<P>It's like you're the captain and your wife is supposed to be the first mate and you NEED her help to navigate the ocean goer but she's NOT paying attention and you see the dangerous rocks ahead and there's a nasty storm brewing outside and have to man-handle that vessle yourself to shore... You need help and she's not there for you BUT YOU can do it - it's exceedingly difficult! BUT, you must for the sake and lives of your crew... your kids. HANG in there and do what YOU need to do given your LACK of resources and expertise to get you to shore safely...<P>Peace friend...<P>------------------<BR><I>"You will deceive yourself into believing that if people, circumstances, and events had been different, your pain would not exist...Your pain is the concrete way in which you participate in the pain of humanity."</I> <BR>~ Henri Nouwen ~